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Friday, April 4, 2008

Friday Caption Contest (Swingers)

156 comments:

i hate labour said...

We have sex in public, "So what"!
"So WHAAAT", Gordon will be sooooo jealous!

sidsid said...

Two minds without a single thought

Anonymous said...

This beats standing up in a hammock

Jowell Mortgage Advisory Services said...

Animal-Human Embryo Experiment Goes Horribly Wrong!

Anonymous said...

Jenny Lives With Andy and Ed

bend over for gordon said...

Two of Brown's pet monkeys try to cheer up their chronically depressed and psychotic master.

45govt said...

Tweedledum to Tweedledee - "Ooohh, I feel like a firemsn!"

Tweeledee to Tweedledum - "Don't be silly, where will we find a fireman around here?"

Anonymous said...

When Ian ("Yvette") Is Away, Eddie Will Play

backwoodsman said...

"Yvette says grown ups do this to make babies"

GF said...

Swingers: A metaphor for government policy

Dave said...

"Grown men fuck on child's swing."

stroppycow said...

I'd prefer to see them swinging from lampposts!

Anonymous said...

As much as I would like to offer something funny, I think "Idiots" sums up this picture much better.

Having said that: "Look, I don't always follow Gordon's lead. I don't even tuck my trousers into my socks."

Madasafish said...

Gordon said "you'll swing for it".

FreeBritannia said...

I said "swinging from LAMPPOSTS" !!!

sherlock said...

twisting in the wind but hanging on for dear life.

Anonymous said...

Sorry Guido, it's just tooooooo fucking easy this one...

Anonymous said...

Will acting like little boys make Gordon love us even more?

Anonymous said...

Cabinet ministers feeling at home.

Will this 'spitting image' MK II prog on ITV this weekend be up to it, that is the question.

Anonymous said...

Yvette says " I'll just go and get Mr Pierrepoint. He'll show you what you are doing wrong!

Ghost of Ian Smith

stroppycow said...

Pillocks on swings - whilst rest of Government is on the slide - boom boom!!

mitch said...

The other end of the rope connects to gordons mouth.

or

Shouldn't there be a scrotum around these?

stroppycow said...

They haven't dug the pit deep enough!

Devil's Kitchen said...

"Now we've had to hand our email addresses to the government and been banned from Facebook, this was the only thing left..."

DK

Gary Elsbys arse said...

Please guido, can I appeal to your better nature, this is just sick. Please take it down. These gay cunts have wifes who may well be reading. Two fucking simpering half wits on a kiddies playground swing getting excited watching Gordo play with the kids, it wont be nice for them!

Gary Elsbys arse, Stoke(and thats fucking on trent to you right wing bastards)

Anonymous said...

'balls, don't burn em'

Penfold said...

Only 30, in Gordo's gang ya gotta be a fiftier or more.....wheeeeee.

Anonymous said...

of course i'm gotdons man - you can tel by the way my balls are swingng

jaymason said...

2 more bent cunts swinging in the wind how gordy wishes he was in the middle one up him and him up the other

fucking money wasting cunts

Julian said...

Government ministers demonstrate further incompetence in that even when given enough rope to hang themselves they swing on it instead.

Watervole said...

No doubt following our great leader's tone, these two pillocks of the establishment appear to have taken the phrase "big swinging dick" a little too literally.....

Anonymous said...

Comeon kids we've got sweets in the car

Anonymous said...

Hod it and Dod it, strike again....

Serf said...

Pictures emerge of two of Ken's secret children.

Ken is believed to be a good father to them, visiting there institution regularly.

RightyRightWing said...

We clubbed together & bought this sex swing out of our stationary expenses

Anonymous said...

Ministers try to connect with swing voters

MisterE said...

"Government Minister Andy Burnham swings his balls in children's playground..."

Homosexualist_Bummer said...

We're a couple of cunts

stroppycow said...

When you've got them by the balls.....

Anonymous said...

Like a pair of ill-fitting underpants, Balls swings from side to side

atheist said...

Is this what they meant when they said we needed stringing up by our balls?

machiavelli said...

Ed: "Do you feel a prick?"

Andy: "Later"

Mark McDonald for Labour Treasurer said...

Burnham: My balls swing left.

Gary Glitters laptop said...

Fuck me, I regonise that playground. Good to see all my old mates are still there. I remember three of them though. The other one was a dirty great big fat bastard of a thing. Used to eat his own snot, thought he would be prime minister one day, as if, who would vote for that cunt!

Maybe ed de ball bollocks is saying to the other gob shite..

' look at the Führer, he puts all his weight behind them kids, I think he loves it just as much as they dont. Yes indeed, he certainly can get them swings high'

Anonymous said...

We’re swinging through the pain
Just swinging in the pain
What a glorious feelin'
We’re hap-hap-happy again
We’re laughing at Gordon’s clouds
So dark just above
Murdoch’s Sun's in our hearts
And our expenses are well paid
Let the stormy clouds chase
Every schmuck immigrant voter and loser to our place
Come on with the pain, with so many state dependants we can only gain
State parasites put a smile on our face
Even the Beeb’ll grease us down Wood lane
Middle England suffers to Scotland's gain,
What a happy refrain

Just swingin',
Swingin' in the pain

Schadenfreude said...

It's a case of swings and roundabouts as Brownies replace Blairites and voters ask "what the f*ck are they playing at?!"

Montgomery Mahogany-Coyne said...

"I swing both ways"

"So what?"

Gordon's Rocking Horse said...

With Reo Speedwagon's "I can't fight this feeling anymore" playing in the background....

"So Ed, is this what Yvette meant when she said you were Swingers?"

GS said...

Fat ugly boy at play with his handsome chum.

Chris said...

LONDON ZOO UNVEILS NEW INHABITANTS

Excitement in Regent's Park today, as London Zoo unveiled their new attraction, a pair of rare Chinese Hairless 'Minister' Apes.

Here seen playfully swinging in their new specially built enclosure, the Apes, Soh Wat and Mai Kup, are sure to excite visitors and Zoologists alike.

Plans are for the two to mate, as revealed by an insider at the Zoo who told us that "they should go and fuck themselves"..(cont page 10)...

Gareth said...

Ed: Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee I'm the King of the Swingers.
Andy: No, that's Tommy Sheridan.
Andy: Haven't we got anything better to do?
Ed: So what!
Andy: You've stood in some dogshit Ed.
Ed: So what!
Andy: What's the weight limit on this thing?
Ed: So what!
Andy: People say I look stupid for wearing eye makeup.
Ed: So what!
Andy: We look like a couple of pricks.
Ed: So what!
Andy: We shit out legislation just to keep us looking busy and important.
Ed: So what!
Andy: It's not really fair to fleece the taxpayers with our expenses is it Ed?
Ed: So what!
Andy: After more then a decade of ever rising taxes, where's all the money gone?
Ed: So what!
Andy: Gordon's shit at being PM.
Ed: Yeah, I know.


It's a long caption I'll grant you.

warriormonk said...

'push ME, push ME' andy cried out excitedly as he competed with ed for uncle gordons affections.

The old scot laughed heartily, and shaking his head with mirth continued to stroke his (small) penis through the fabric of his suit trousers.

he leant back against the climbing frame and surveyed the scene in front of him.. Ahhh this was the life eh? and sarah would'nt be back for over three hours...

mary jane rotten-crotch said...

Dope on a rope. (Two of 'em)

bogeyman said...

Come in now, children. Playtime over.

Charlotte Corday said...

"So twat!"
or
The Secretary for Children acts like a child while the Culture Secretary acts like a complete cult.

inspector plod said...

Two chavs vandalise playground equipment.

Anonymous said...

Ed to Andy: Is that a rope between your legs, or are you just pleased to see me?

Andy to Ed: Cover that ankle, you shameless hussy.

Anonymous said...

Brown's bum boys on a rope.

Anonymous said...

Aren't you Ron Davies?

veronica said...

Friday Caption Competition (Wankers)

Ma'ams mic said...

"We can be snot free"
(Vocals by blinky balls)
I
I wish you could swing
Like Gordon
On his rocking thing
Though no one, no one
Wears pampers like snotty
He can wear them
For ever and ever
Oh we can be snot free
Just for one day

I
I will be king
And you
You will be queen
Though nothing can
Get back to Gordon
We can be snot free
Just for one day
We can be lovers
Just for one day


(all royalties go to snotgobblers anonymous, please give generously)

Anonymous said...

Two New Labour ministers seen playing at a children's playground in an attempt to groom them for underage sex.

In Like Flynn said...

Children look on as Andy plays with balls

drunken tory said...

I always thought people like those two were banned from play parks. If I saw one sweaty obese man and another wearing makeup cavorting around the children on the rope swings I'd call the police.

Christian May said...

The nervous smiles couldn't hide their fear; which would Gordon drop first?

stroppycow said...

(Gordon's) Muppets on a string.

Thatsnews said...

Is the correct English: Is that Balls is or Balls are swinging?
So what?!

Anonymous said...

Ed to Andy: "So I said to Harriet -You won't get me doing something stupid just for a photo op."

Andy to Ed : "Well at least we're not wearing stab vests and this is like dangerous innit !"

stroppycow said...

Ministers go wild on finally discovering the only playing field not sold off by their useless Government.

Anonymous said...

Now it's official: we swing the same way as Gordon!

Anonymous said...

saw this picture and "69 comments" in the link... but they're not in a 69 position

Click Refresh said...

Yes, we are in charge of running this poor country - what are you looking so worried about?

Anonymous said...

OH SHUT THE FUCK UP DICK WEED.

You all love your anti hero Guido

He hates the UK government
He hates the royal family
He lambastes every institution in the land .

He gives the impression that he is patriot to the Tory cause, and is devastated at what has happen under new labour

HORSE SHIT FOOLS

Fuckes is an Irishman living in Ireland, making his living in the UK..WHAT A CUNT

Typical NeoCon…Biting the hand that feeds him.

So carry on your love affair with Guido…He is fooling you all.

PS G Fuckes makes numerous FOI queries, each can cost upto £250 to research. That cost is picked up by the UK tax payer of which G FUCKES isn't one.

Ninnymous said...

"Cock and Balls"

Invicta said...

That's right lads, that's the rope now pick your lamp posts

Have faith said...

Balls tries to bolster his image as a heavyweight contender for the labout crown.

Anonymous said...

A fat bloke and his transvestite lover fight over who gets to get their photo taken doing a ken livingstone impression after finding a broomstick in a park

Anonymous said...

anon 3.56, a.k.a grumpy yvette cooper...



so what?!

pair of tossers said...

Ed: "Swings are fun"

Andy: "But rocking horses are better"

drunken tory said...

Nonnymong 3.56

If you don't like it here or you don't like Mr Fawkes you can always fuck off. No one compels you to be here and we quite like it.

balls-up and burn'em said...

Andy "Oh look, isn't that Gordon over there, watching us and masturbating?"

Ed "It's me he's watching, not you"

Andy "Bitch!"

Ed "Cow!!"

Anonymous said...

Now we've got enough rope let's swing together!

poor old frogface cooper said...

Ed dumps Yvette for a pretty girlie

Anonymous said...

the tory legacy: care in the community and it's sad concequences

Anonymous said...

Andy: "Ed - stop complaining and keep climbing and for Gods Sake don't let go of the rope !"

Ed: " When you said you'd laid on a 'copter to take us to our next event I thought the damn thing would at least have landed first !"

Anonymous said...

The FOI Additional Expense Claims are out

Howard Claimed - £20,347.
Prescott - £20,057
Mr Sayeed - £18,618.
Blair - £15,490
Brown - £14,304.
Kennedy's - £12,869

Conservative leader
David Cameron claimed

** £21,293 **

OH DEAR

genghiz the kahn said...

Ah ! ça ira, ça ira, ça ira,
Et leur infernale clique
Au diable s’envolera.
Ah! ça ira, ça ira, ça ira Ah!
les aristocrates à la lanterne!
Ah! ça ira, ça ira, ça ira Ah!
les aristocrates on les pendra!
Et quand on les aura tous pendus
On leur fichera la pelle au cul

[Ah! It'll be fine, It'll be fine, It'll be fine,
And their infernal clique
Shall go to hell
It'll be fine, It'll be fine, It'll be fine
aristocrats to the lamposts
It'll be fine, It'll be fine, It'll be fine
the aristocrats, we'll hang them!
And when we'll have hung them all
We'll stuff a spade up their arse].

Canute said...

Swing low, sweet charlatans.

peter carter-fuck said...

That's one spit roast Yvette Cooper was glad to miss.

Anonymous said...

Burnham and Balls have a gay time on the swings.

Anonymous said...

anonymous @ 4.23

so what!!

Anonymous said...

Shirker's Playtime

antifascist said...

What was Gary Glitter sent to prison for,messing about with kids.So what are these two grown men doing in a pre-school playground,waiting for a ride?Doing a Davies!

Anonymous said...

..... and after this Gordon's going to watch us scrum down.

tapestry said...

do we look like Nazis to you?

Matt said...

Not to be out done by Nick Clegg, Ed and Milaband joined a swingers club to get their tally up.

mitch said...

OT but Mr Brown, the biggest element of whose £14,304 ACA claim was £2,450 of mortgage payments, also got back £2,380 for cleaning but nothing for food.

He did not claim for any family travel but two journeys by air from his Dunfermline constituency to the capital cost a total of £11,826.

Using the fucken space shuttle it would seem and why after spending £2k on cleaning does he look and smell like a tramp??

Bryan Appleyard said...

The Scissors Sisters

Anonymous said...

Guido,

This is beyond just tasteless.

Trubes said...

The First Two Tits of Spring !

ed balls and his bitch said...

coooo eeeeeee, gordy love, over here, after you have finished with the 10 year olds me and this other grinning cunt would like a go on that big cluncking fist of yours!

Anonymous said...

Burnham: "I've always wanted to dangle next to Brown's Balls"

Old Tyke said...

"Fuck you and fuck the electorate too."

anonycunt hater said...

5:22 Anonycunt said...
Guido,

'This is beyond just tasteless.'

Yes, its rather good too! Now fuck off you miserable cunt.

Anonymous said...

Pair of cunts.

Nuff said.



Keith Dovkunts

Anonymous said...

Andy jug ears has a great pitch on the Guardian web site tonight

cassandra said...

SUNG TO THE TUNE OF WOULD YOU LIKE TO SWING ON A STAR.

We'd like to swing on a star, carry stolen cash home in a jar and we'll be better off than YOU are OR would you like to be an (EU)star?
A star is little thing that hangs on a flag, a star is tiny part of the E Universe, Or would you like to be a slave?
A slave is an animal who does what the're told! A slave is an animal who don't get a vote!
OR WOULD YOU RATHER SLIT THEIR THROATS!

mr marr comes clean said...

"I'm just the glove puppet and they are the people who have their hands up my bottom."

http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2008/apr/04/bbc.television

Anonymous said...

Heaven loves ya
The clouds part for ya
Nothing stands in your way
When you're a boy

Clothes always fit ya
Life is a pop of the cherry
When you're a boy

When you're a boy
You can wear a uniform
When you're a boy
Other boys check you out
You get a girl
These are your favourite things
When you're a boy

Boys
Boys
Boys keep swinging
Boys always work it out

Uncage the colours
Unfurl the flag
Luck just kissed you hello
When you're a boy

They'll never clone ya
You're always first on the line
When you're a boy

When you're a boy
You can buy a home of your own
When you're a boy
Learn to drive and everything
You'll get your share
When you're a boy

Boys
Boys
Boys keep swinging
Boys always work it out


BTW Fawkes, the scrutineer of politicians : Living in Ireland how come you failed to notice that the Taoiseach was on the fiddle. Or did you notice but just not dare to say so?

peter carter-fuck said...

"BTW Fawkes, the scrutineer of politicians : Living in Ireland how come you failed to notice that the Taoiseach was on the fiddle. Or did you notice but just not dare to say so?"

Have you not noticed that this is a blog about British politics? I believe there are some corrupt politicians in the Dominican Republic too, but I really couldn't give a fuck.

Anonymous said...

Very sad for th UK we have a monkey government.

Anonymous said...

Hoist by your own petard

Carter-Fuck

A. J. Scrotum said...

OK up there! Cut the ropes now and drop them in the quicklime!

watch the fuckwits said...

Ed "Coo-ee! Here I am Gordon! Look at me playing on the swing!"

Andy "I'm a lady!"

g1lgam3sh said...

Shouldn't they have a scrotum around them?





nhosfx*

*too good toresist

g1lgam3sh said...

"3:09 PM, April 04, 2008"

If I'd read that before I posted I wouldn't even have entered. *cough*

Sublime...you owe me a glass of wine, oh and a monitor.

g1lgam3sh said...

" Anonymous said...

OH SHUT THE FUCK UP DICK WEED.

You all love your anti hero Guido

He hates the UK government
He hates the royal family
He lambastes every institution in the land .

He gives the impression that he is patriot to the Tory cause, and is devastated at what has happen under new labour

HORSE SHIT FOOLS

Fuckes is an Irishman living in Ireland, making his living in the UK..WHAT A CUNT

Typical NeoCon…Biting the hand that feeds him.

So carry on your love affair with Guido…He is fooling you all.

PS G Fuckes makes numerous FOI queries, each can cost upto £250 to research. That cost is picked up by the UK tax payer of which G FUCKES isn't one.

3:56 PM, April 04, 2008"

D'oh

What's the weather like on your planet? We don't give a fuck who he is or where he lives.

We just give a fuck about what he says,what he does, what he reveals about cunts taking the piss.

You should know, you're a cunt.

Anonymous eh, original name...Cunt!

Anonymous said...

Sorry but your caption does not fit the picture. You have been disqualified.

david smith said...

What a pathetic bunch of morons you all are, almost as bad as that gang of doom-mongering losers on www.housepricecrash.co.uk

Grow up. We've had a record number of quarters of uninterrupted growth entirely thanks to talented management by Gordon Brown and Ed Balls. The latest problems are just a minor blip and soon house prices will begin to rise again, consumer borrowing and spending will resume, and the economy will be back on course for many more years of strong growth.

You should all get down on your knees and thank God for Gordon Brown not mock him with unsubstantiated smears. He is truly a great man and the UK economy is the strongest in Europe if not the world.

Anonymous said...

Gordon told us we're on the ropes.

red despot spotter said...

ill go for reverse humour

"andy burnham and schools secretary ed balls annouce £200 milion play space investment program "

Ha Ha Ha Ha

jungle book

EB:Now ime the king of the swingers whoaa a jungle VIP
our poll ratings slumped gordons going to get dumped and thats whats a bothering me!

AB: I wanna be a man , man cub and stroll right into office , but browns got me down and ime a clown and thats whats a bothering me!

together: Oh o be dupe , i want be like dave avvve (shoo be do be do ee) I wana walk like him talk like him OOOhhh OOOOhhh .
You see Its true ooohh ooohhh i want be like dave avvee .(shoo be dupe we o we)

POll like him , talk like him hes coooool .

you see its true ooohh oooh that gits like we eeey, have fooled you oohh (shoo be dup be du we )

so learn to be , want to be a ecnomic fo-oo-ul (one more time)

so learn to be , want to be a fool


thanksyouverymuch

transfattyacid said...

New Labour Ministers Play With Secret Love Children

Anonymous said...

could Mr Balls be a closet Freemason?

petuniabean said...

Sorry, am being too sick to comment.........

sherlock said...

David smith,
YOu must be fucking gordon to come up with that worshipping drivel. There's no other explanation.

Anonymous said...

While the cat's away (Macavity) the Mice will play!

Budgie said...

"You should all get down on your knees and thank God for Gordon Brown not mock him with unsubstantiated smears. He is truly a great man and the UK economy is the strongest in Europe if not the universe."
signed
Andy and Ed (slaver, suck!)

45govt said...

david smith you gibbering cunt - you are Kevin Toilets McGuire aka Hazelnuts Tree from the Tel, and I claim my fiver.

Wotta pillock - "a truly great man"??? The ignorant Nancy McBroon is NO kind of a man at all, just a shabby, greasy snot-gobbling fairy with a lot of arse-bandit playmates like those two tossers in the picture.

Fuck off and take that monocular perverted cunt with you.

ed has is balls up the other grinning cunts arse on a swing said...

Dave smith, that is the funniest posting I have read since gary elsbys last load of bollocks. Utter shite of course but very funny. Are you tory boys never grow up in disguise.
Now fuck off you useless, whining, miserable socialist loving fucking son of a stoke on trent whore.

Silent Hunter said...

Is this the best our country has to offer in 'leadership' ?

I weep for our country.

Anonymous said...

David Smith was very funny, don't fuck off, send another

Anonymous said...

Gordy! Gordy! look at us, this is way better than that rocking horse....

(Stephen)

david smith said...

You really are a bunch of cretinous, negative, doome-mongering white trash on this site aren't you? I think you lot must be the same scum who inhabit the chief doom-monger site full of neo-nazis, Austrian economists, survivalists, BNP'ers, Tory boys, : www.housepricecrash.co.uk

Let me spell it out in words of one syllable that even primitive Tory baboons like you may understand:

Thanks to the great economic management of Gordon Brown the UK economy is now the strongest in Europe by a mile, if not the world.

It is cleverly based on a strong and rapidly growing housing market and continually rising house prices which enable the majority of the population (apart from you losers who are probably renters)to borrow against the rising value of their house to finance purchases like 4x4's foreign holidays, cheap Chinese imports, and even food, booze etc.

You have to admit that it is fiendishly clever of Gordon Brown to enable the British people to enjoy such a high standard of living on the back of ever rising house prices.

After a brief blip in the market, which had you doom-mongers slavering with delight, house prices have strengthened and will continue on their upward route. A huge lack of supply in this country and an ever growing immigrant population will ensure that house prices never fall and just go on rising, enabling British consumers to keep on borrowing and spending and fuelling the UK economy.

Now can you appreciate the genius of Gordon Brown. Don't you losers wish you had a seat on the gravy train instead of being left behind. No wonder you're all such bitter, twisted nonentities.

Now get back to your pathetic, envious, playground taunts against a great man.

Technicolour Yawn said...

Look Mummy, two "Dopes on a Rope".

Anonymous said...

Younger members of the Volksturm about to do battle for the great leader, as soon as they finish their playtime.