Boris Will Do PMQs Tomorrow
Guido can confirm the Times' Sam Coates exclusive that Boris will lead for the Tories against Harriet Harman tomorrow at PMQs. Repeated misleading references to Boris by Gordon Brown were the trigger for Cameron's decision to give Boris an unprecedented right of reply in the PM's absence. The last time a backbencher was given such an opportunity was during Asquith's time."Lets face it, Boris is better known than most of the shadow cabinet, this will give him a chance to show leadership, he will crush Harriet Harman at the dispatch box". Is this a high risk strategy? Not really, he is up against Harriet Harman...
136 comments:
tell me this is true mr fawkes..
source?
confirmation?
gallery passes are going to be gold dust.
should go nice with harpics Pr stunt in her constuancy of wearing a stab proof vest .
although if she goes for a low cut racy number boris could be in trouble , just keep thinking she is ken boris, is my advice !
VIVA BORIS ! (to rob an earlier post)
proposal for question 1
"would the goverment confirm if the untreatable snotgobblers disease is the same as alan johnsons disease and livingstones disease and if the police will be needing silver bullits and garlic ?"
hmmm... April Fools Day is it?
Happy 1st April Guido!
Harbint is toast. This will be better than Jaws.
RDS - or:- "would the govt consider providing free incontinence pads for soon-to-be-indigent rocking horse jockeys?"
April fool, anyone?
I trust he will harvest the spaghetti trees before he appears?
you fucker fawkes!
you had me so fucking excited at the prospect of this glorious moment in British politics that i fell for it for so long until I realised it was the April Fools day..
i'm going to get you for this fawkes.. one day.
fuck.
Look at the date.
Best Regards, Loof Lirpa
Getting in early Guido?
I know it's supposed to finish at midday but starting at 1am is a bit unsporting.
Yeh and apparently the Daily Mail has also caught Alastair Darling out as a secret dabbler of scratch cards, pulling up every day in his "chauffeur driven limo" on his way to the Treasury. Mmm
This must have something to do with 1 April
Further questions - does Harperson wear her flak jacket to Cabinet Meetings? Is the flak jacket David Abrahams proof? Will a flak jacket be standard government issue to all ministers after 1 May? Can the RAF drop a "bunker-buster" on No 10 in today's fly-past, for a larf?
Just listened to the hag being openly laughed at by John Humphries this morning. What a stupid, preposterous, screeeching loser she is - yet she's still getting our money. She wore a stab vest as she would a hard on a building site or a white hat and coat in a meat factory.....silly cow!
April fool methinks.
From anonymous:
tell me this is true mr fawkes..
1:39 AM, April 01, 2008
-------------
He he.....
1st April already? Where is this year going?
I presume this is an April Fool but then as most of the pieces on the Today programme sound like April Fools, most mornings.
Presumably she will be sporting her usual "when in London, don the flak jacket" rig.
The Tuscan will accept the existence of God if Boris manages to get her back to his place afterwards for some polymorphous perversion.
Hmmmm...
*checks date*
Something fishy about this one...
harperson got it wrong, she should have gone for the full face veil, not the stab jacket. Why are all nulab wimmin congenitally stupid ?
tell me this is true mr fawkes..
The date of the post would suggest otherwise.
1 April?
Mind you I thought Harman's stabvest tour of Basra, sorry Peckham, was a wind up...
At first I thought that this is a very bad Idea.
Then I looked at the date.
This is a really bad idea. With Boris in pole position, the last thing we need is to give the government a chance to take shots at him. One major gaffe from Boris could do him some serious damage.
This is such a bad idea. Leaving Boris completely exposed to the media and to government attacks is a really stupid strategy and jeopardises his whole campaign. He should be protected, not left out on a line.
What great news for April 1st
April Fool.
I claim my Michelin-starred dinner with Guido.
Under the "rules" Boris will have too be opposed by the equivalent in the other party.
Looking forward to Dennis Skinner's first front bench appearance. It (April 2nd) will be a day to remember)
Boris?? Great!!!
But this is an April Fool joke on the lobby, right?
OT - There is a wonderful photo of Ed Bollox in the Times diary today, reading "Keeping Pet Chickens". You would think THAT is an April Fools joke - but apparently not. You should use it for your captions competition.
Ed Balls and his civil partner, Ian "Yvette" Cooper must surely out-rank Hagperson and Droney as the UK's most odious couple?
OT
"At a meeting last night Labour MP John Sheridan sugested to Gordon Brown that former ministers who criticise the government "should be injected with rabies". The Prime Minister was seen to smile followed by a discernible nod of his head"
Charlie Clarke should watch his back!
Guido la poisson d'Avril.
Get rid of comment moderation, it pisses me off! When I call someone a cunt IE- Gordon Brown is a cunt, I want to see it in all it glory there and then, not after Guido has finished his fucking weetabix and decides its good enough.
And the date today is?.......................
Is this an April fool, by any chance Guido?
The Telegraph have gone with flying penguins!
What's the date again?
hmmm - I'm assuming any comments pointing out the date would get moderated...
Is this a date affected story?
April Fool, surely
I note the date is April 1st.....
Boris Leader's Questions = April 1
Tomorrow's PMQs, Guido? Isn't tomorrow 2 April, the day after, you know, 1 April?
Heh.
April Fools!!!
icarus - there are no rules, when the PM is absent someone fills in. Cameron could choose to keep his appointment it is only convention that the other Party leaders also absent themselves.
Guido, this is the fake story of the day, and I claim my copy of 'Portaits of Courage'.
err its April 1st......
OK. As you moderated my last comment. Here's an anagram of it, so not to spoil things.
Flair Polo!
And I understand that Boris is going to ask all his questions in Latin.
This shouldn't be a problem for Harman, because she's posher than Boris and went to a more exclusive public school.
april fool???
Discusted grange over sands
Excellent April Fool - well done
This has to be an April Fool's gag.
What was the point in Harwench wearing that stab-vest? She should have worn a helmet with a visor because anyone who's seen her on telly is going to want to stab her in the face.
Not being nasty or anything, just a fact.
Guido,what's the date please ?
Good effort, and more plausible that John "fucking" Hutton being voted the best-performing Labour minister, which unfortunately is true.
So Boris will do PMQ's we learn today, and tomorrow it will be Denis Sinner (sorry, that was a genuine typo but will leave it in!)on Dispatch Box duty. The next thing will be that after Seldons 'Blair' and Bowers 'Brown' New Labour will be daft enough to make GB Labour leader and thus PM!
This is even more clever than you may at first think. Harman doesn't do comedy at all and Boris will have her running around.
Good clever move.
I though the following commons Q&A - published yesdterday - was quite amusing. Livingslime claims to have the ear of ministers, but the Snot Eater won't even admit meeting him. (And notice what a cowardly, pro forma answer is given by McBean).
Mayor of London
Mr. Hoban: To ask the Prime Minister how many official meetings he has had with the Mayor of London since 27 June 2007. [195852]
The Prime Minister: I have regular meetings and discussions with ministerial colleagues and others on a wide range of subjects.
Hmmm it is April 1st today-cant help but feel there is some truth lacking?
April fool I claim my £5...
This is compulsory viewing.
As for LettersFromaTory "One major gaffe from Boris could do him some serious damage." Oh ye of little faith. Let the Bozza rip.
I wonder if he's going to tackle the stupid bint on her latest wheeze to prosecute the guv'nor if a customer calls the barmaid 'love'.
He could also ask when she's going to ban sausages.
I sincerely hope that this is an April Fools.
Does anyone here remember that it is the 1st of April?
April Fools?
April Fool?
Jacqui Smith is too back date the Police pay rise with immediate effect. Its on the BBC web site. She also said you will be getting a 6% increase this year with a one off payment depending on number of years worked!
Gordon Brown was quoted as saying he was delighted and hoped the Police would be happy with the latest offer.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/police_pay
Brilliant Guido.....
Boris doing PMQ's
Harman in a stab proof jacket..
April fools day is it..?
Good try , but you can't fool us..
My phone rang first thing this morning, it was my 5 year old grandson, 'gramps theres snow on our cars!' I rushed to the window, 'no there's not' I was baffled. 'April fool' he cried. I was gutted.
Going to be a cracker - can't wait!
For a moment you had me going there. Then I remembered the date.
What a wizzard wheeze!
As Boris might say in Latin:
Polar Foil!
Guido, I can understand you wanting to keep the joke going as long as possible and thats why you didn't publish my comment this morning, but I would appreciate an acknowledgement that I was the first to relate this story to the date.
Regards, Loof Lirpa
Should we be checking the date for this story?
Bozza getting 'up against' Harriet, eh? I might even put some film in the camera. Mind you, she's a sweaty girl - plenty of lubrication there - she'll need it if she's going to be crushed.
God I hate this day of the year!
obvious april fool. parliamentary convention does not allow for it.
April Fool ...
I wish this were true.
April Fools!
It's the First of April lads..
WAH !
That's why I said - "rules".
Every fule knows that this is an april fule, dont they?
Nice try, Guido - but all who are getting excited should look at their calendars.........
How come they managed to get a vest for Harman? There aren't enough flak jackets to go round in Iraq and the 'Stan, but yet they can find one for her.
Surely an April Fool?
Too gimmicky. Boris has done well to keep his campaign fixed on the London stage. He doesn't need to get distracted asking questions about Iraqistan et al.
Oh do come on. You lot have all been taken in. Look at today's date....
this isn't an April Fool is it?
errrr - April Fool, anyone?
Has no one looked at the date? LOL
Ok, does no one realise it is April fools day?.....
This is an April Fool's!
Oh my God, what a stupid tactical error of cosmic proportions!
Why fight a battle you don't need to fight?
This is completely unconnected with Boris' battle with Ken.
When you go fishing for shark, why put your head over the side looking for mackeral?
This is a lose lose lose situation for Boris.
If he loses, the consequences are just too dreadful.
If he crushes Harman he will alienate a lot of women voters.
If it's a draw everyone will say "against Harman a draw is pathetic".
So I may be missing the bleeding obvious, but I can't see how this enhances his position as Mayoral candidate one bit.
OT: Livingstone just keeps on self-harming...
http://timesonline.typepad.com/politics/2008/04/ken-livingstone.html
I think the magic words here are "April Fool"!
april fools
BTW Coates now reckons it'll be Hague, which should be far more entertaining. The gleeful kicking she got from Humphrys this morning will seem like a french kiss after Hague's finished with her...
Judging from the photo, I would say that Boris wins by a nose. What a hooter. Where did he get that from?
Ladies and gentlemen - APRIL FOOLS?!
:-)
I know its April 1st but...
Ummm.... has no-one lese noticed the date.
This is an April Fool!
April Fool anyone?
This is an April Fools joke, right?
It's still April Fools' Day, even though Guido seems to be bllocking comments that point it out.
C'est un poisson d'avril, n'est-ce pas?
8/10. Took me 30 seconds to twig.
April Fool?
April fools anyone? (smiles smugly at all the fools around him)
robbie said...
Judging from the photo, I would say that Boris wins by a nose. What a hooter. Where did he get that from?
Your not wrong there. Gary Elsby would love for me to sit on that, he is always whining how the tories will fuck us if they get power! Silly cunt he is, bless him!
mmmmmmm - look at the date lads and ladettes - suspect this is a bit of a todger-puller!
erm... April Fool?
? April fool
errr.... April Fools day anyone??
I take it that since you haven't approved my comment, it must be a joke?
That's a shame, it would have been TV gold...
No probs if Guido is being mischievous. The boy Hague is next in line to take on Harperson and is quite capable of making fragrant mincemeat.
You fucker. It took a phonecall to a local MP for gallery passes, for the penny to drop.
8:47 AM
In absolute agreement there, darling. I could have written that comment myself. Why should Guido sit in judgment upon our cunts. My cunt's as good as the next person's.
Iain Dale insists it's going to be Theresa May. But is that a cunning April Fool too?
Guido, you bastard it wasn't April 1st here when I posted - I've been had!
Nice one though.
Have Peckham plod handed in Jacqui's stab vest yet and claimed the Michelin-starred dinner GF so rashly promised on 30 March? There were at least 3 of them in the photo.
But Iain Dale would say that - I think he has a thing about 'fuck me' shoes and their occupants.
Today's picture must represent Harmon's April Fools joke surely?
How does this jammy bastard get so much quality minge?
http://www.thefirstpost.co.uk/themole,,touchy-feely-brown-a-flop,23273
Touchy-feely Brown a flop. It was less of a rallying call, more of a plea for sympathy, according to those who heard last night's speech by Gordon Brown to the Parliamentary Labour Party, first flagged here last week.
Brown urged MPs to go out and tell the troublesome voters that the Government 'is on your side'. This new touchy-feely approach from the Iron Chancellor was clearly dreamed up by his new political guru, Stephen Carter, and it went down like a lead balloon with some of his MPs who were left muttering "Try saying that on the doorsteps of the thousands on low pay - natural Labour voters - who will see their tax go UP from this month while those earning over £18,000 will see it go down" - or words to that effect.
The tax change is the result of Brown's last Budget in which he cut the general rate of income tax from 22p in the pound to 20p but scrapped the lower 10p rate.
Brown also called in a group of regional newspaper journalists for a fireside chat at Downing Street to tell them the good news: the economy is not as bad as people say; inflation is low and will continue to be low.
Meanwhile, there has been a loss of nerve over Harriet Harman fronting for Brown at Prime Minister's Questions while he is away in Bucharest tomorrow for the Nato summit. On Monday, Brown's men were saying it was normal for the Leader of the House to deputise for Brown at the despatch box. But it is now believed that William Hague has been put up by the Tories, not Theresa May, Harman's shadow, and there are suggestions that Jack Straw will front for Brown. We will see.
FIRST POSTED APRIL 1, 2008
Broon has just been asked by a Sun reporter what he thinks of the behaviour of professional footballers and whether Harperson should have worn the flak jacket. He went on at length about footballers but ignored the jacket.
Later Letts challenged him, said we knew she was 'a nightmare' and asked GB why he had dodged the question and what he thought about it. GB went on again at great length on community policing, that she wore the jacket to signify that she was alongside community police, how everybody would have the mobile phone number of a community police person and on and on. He is so boring, so dull, so lacking in a sense of humour and has no flair unlike his partner in crime his predecessor the war criminal.
Dammit Guido!
I believed it until I remembered the date...
Nice one.
And the award for the feeblest April Fool goes to:
http://www.taxresearch.org.uk/Blog/
Hit Ken where it hurts- in the wallet!
Click this link to Google and start hitting the 'Sponsored Link' to Ken's website.
Every time you play, Ken pays!
Average Google ads cost the advertiser 10p, so get a quid's worth out of your comrade. Remember, he's had more than a quid's worth out of your taxes!
Can't wait for Boris v Harman tomorrow!
Well after looking at the photo I reckon Boris might win by a nose.
net loss, I would gladly do that, but surely you realise that the corrupt cunt will be paying the advertising bills out of taxpayers money?
Let's not forget that public money is only there to serve the needs of the self serving corrupt fuckers in the Labour party.
One April Fool gag did occur to me:
A mock-up of a letter from the Blair Foundation to Heather Mills welcoming her as a new Middle Eastern peace envoy, with a hint of sexual chemistry!
On reflection, it struck me as too close to reality to be absurd.
This Boris gag was good though.....
i'll be very surprised if this isnt an april fool.
boris's campaign has been laser-like in its 100 per cent focus on London and nothing but London. PMQs would be a distraction.
just look at his picture on his blog
there's boris , on the tube:
http://www.boris-johnson.com/
"while he is away in Bucharest tomorrow for the Nato summit.."
praying for the Romanians to do another Ceaucescu....
You Fat sorry misogynistic twit.
I'm going to get you, I swear I will.
BASTARD!
Interesting that Lardarse Harman wore a stab vest that extended only to her porky midriff. Given that the only slim wpcs are the 60% of them who are todger-dodgers and that the average hetero wpc is a walking advert for KFC/Maxdonalds/non-diet coke/Pukka pies isn't it suspicious that Harriet got such a small vest? Maybe Plod was taking the piss.
Interesting there was no protection for the nether regions though - but presumably a minger like that needn't worry about an attack from a pork sword or a beef bayonet.
If that's Boris, he's really let himself go...
Aaaargh ... I believed this! Only saw the headline in Google Reader (not all the comment/replies). Tuned into 5Live for the PMQ fun and thought "that sounds like Hague"
Excellent work Guido - hook, line and sinker on that one
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