Totty Watch : Black & White Tory Ball
LibDems Should Back Tory Education Policy - LibDem Voice
New Labour's Charge Sheet - Maurice Saatchi
Brown's Reverse Canute Effect - Stumbling & Mumbling
Carter v Heywood during Wimbledon - Red Box
Political Bloggers: the New Opposition? - Guardian
Labour Suicidally Corrupt - Peter Oborne
LibDems to Unilaterally Disclose Expenses - LibDem Voice
Tory MP Puts Mistress on the Payroll - Recess Monkey
Think Tank Round-Up - Cassilis
60 comments:
Who are the top corners please?
Rich bastards.
Top row, second from the right please.
word verif = wllbj
(rows, columns convention)
1:1; possibly 1:2; 2:2; 3:1 in an emergency; 3:3 if I could get a better look at the boat.
Oh my ... I'm joining the Conservatives TODAY!
Much better than your Christmas offering, Guido.
On a less decorous matter, we now have a clearer picture of Snotgobbler's vision and integrity.
Sixteen new casinos are to be given the go-ahead - six months after Gordon Brown signalled a retreat from plans to bring Las Vegas-style gambling to Britain.
"Smaller" casinos with a maximum area of 53,820 sq ft (5,000 sq m) and up to 150 £4,000 slot machines will now be granted licences in Leeds, Southampton, Great Yarmouth, Middlesbrough, Solihull, Hull, Milton Keynes and Newham, London.
A football pitch is approximately 5,000 sq m.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2008/02/07/ncasino107.xml
Poor Tessa. Distraught Cherie. Jealous Gordon.
You just can't buy class...
Imagine the quality of the turnout at Gordon's 'Monster's Ball'.
I did, and now I'm off to wash out my brain with bleach to try and get rid of the image.
The vision of Tom Watson and Yvette Cooper in gimp suits was too much.
Totty watch??
...So what's the thing bottom right...k d lang?
Hear on the Grapevine, there is a Lord Levy moment imminent in Abrahams affair.
Weird LONG skulls most of the women have? What have they been bred from?
Who's the ugly one fouth in on the middle row?
Don't fancy yours much, Guido!
Three from the top, one from the middle and two from the bottom please, Carol.
Mr Ferry appears to have just learned he's sitting next to Miss 'top left hand corner'.
I notice some of the women didn't quite get the "black and white" bit...
Cambo turns to one of the vacuous brain dead little rich girls and asks “Christ I forgot me fags”
To which one of the vacuous brain dead little rich girls replies “No problem darling we have a kilo of Charlie”
Who is that between Trinny and Susannah ? A bit skinny for my tastes.
Although Susannah in the furry stuff...mmmm...yummmmmy..
Oops!
Report in Groaniad that the GMB union have asked the police to investigate whether their donation to Peter Ronseal's deputy leadership election campaign was spent appropriately. They claim that £10,000 cannot be accounted for.
This could be fun.
As a middle aged dad (aka invisble man) I'd be grateful if any of them noticed me! With my luck I would probably get propositioned by bottom left.
Now then, where did I leave those boxing gloves....
I'm not sure if this sort of tory propaganda should be promoted.
but there are some cracking fillies on display!
top left top right full marks.
This is very cruel Guido.
Fancy showing beautiful Tories the very day after Ed Miliband auditioned his ugly mug for the Town Rat-Catcher position at PMQs!!
@ elby: horses, of course.
What, no Boris? Come on; he'd go so well with all the other blondes...which you may take any way you like.
Also: I read the headline before the picture loaded and thought this was some multi-culti porn thing. It's Tories: I should have known better.
You wouldn't kick 1:1 out of bed for making crumbs, now would you?
I think the bottom right corner is a rather poor attempt to pander to your female readers Guido! Surely there was a better looking guy somewhere there?
Chat-up lines won't work with that lot mate, you need to get the Duke of Chi-chester to introduce you and be ready to flash 50g of coke at them.
So the best male totty is bloody Bryan Ferry & DC? I am guessing that there are one or two women on this site who may like to see a less depressing line up of male totty!
(Ok this is a very blokey website but still - give the women some eye candy!)
Cameron is an ass. His lack of tie says it all.
Isn't that chap at bottom right some sort of musician? Wasn't his orchestra called Poxy Music or something?
Still, how very nice to see all these gay young things enjoying themselves - and each other.
I see Gorgons trolls are out and about today, playing the old 'class warfare and drugs' card. Predictable.
Haven't you lot got anything better to do? How about defending your leader after his truly piss poor performance at PMQ's yesterday? Or spinning up the fact that HM Government has taken the Northern Crock debt onto UK Plc's balance sheet?
Or are you waiting for your slimy master to have one of his 'visions'?
Tories show they have the common touch......
And not one of them looks like that pig's cunt Alexander, do they?
koppersnark
can you be more specific? is harman going to get her collar felt??
please say yes
Thank you mr ali campbells a wanker for putting into words the sheer vacuity of the poor No10 trolls' desperate envy. When they think of the gargoyles on display in ZaNuLab, and how they have to share the same air as their greasy, unwashed, stinking, unhygienic cunt of a boss, they must be in despair.
Never mind guys and dogs, you are only really interested in the money anyway aren't you, and a touch of class would not become any of you worthless parasites.
Hope you all look forward to these coming months as much as we do.
My advice to you is - out the Gorgon, and tell him to fuck off. If you have a chance, this is the only one.
PS Ali Campbell is not only a wanker, unwed to a monster sphynx himself, he is a lying gobshite, and I lay Dr Kelly at the vile cunt's door.
GUIDO
Most unfair can we see some male Totty
Funny, I too was at the Ball, and everyone was looking for some bloke called Charlie. He must be very popular.
Have you an idea who this Charlie chap is. He did turn up but I wasn’t introduced to him. But everyone who claimed to have got hold of Charlie were all very excited.
Two things. I take it Ferry has now confirmed himself as an outed Tory and that he's dicked the rest of them, apart from Cammers and Nrs Cammers of course.
Bryan Ferry - father to that idiot who invaded Parliament because they were about to implement the will of the people and ban hunting - welcomed by the Tories.
Says it all really.
Refreshing to see normal people after tom watsons' mug shot - how can one mans face be so revealing about the collective failings of his party ?
Glad to see the brothers are reported to be taking umbridge at phain pocketing their cash !
Which one is Tamzin Lightwater? Still my beating heart.
Cruel of Guido to run this in a month where the Government has been fashing itself to a jelly over obesity and threatening to withold NHS treatment from chubbies whilst offering them benefits to lose the lard.
Iain Dale took the opportunity to boast about his 1/2 stone weight loss (24 Jan) and to wonder why Gordon hadn't sent him round some Argos vouchers or at least a slim-line t-shirt.
The picture seems clear; vote Conservative and you'll be on the way to a size 10, vote Labour and you'll puff up to the size of an airship. Gordon will then face the option of refusing to treat his own voters and having them either go off bang or vote Conservative out of pique.
A google of 'obesity crisis' shows everyone started to suddenly bulk up in 2004. Hmm.
Top left
An ex Mrs Hitch had the dubious pleasure of playing tonsil hockey with Mr Ferry, Her enthusiasm waned somewhat when she felt(with her tongue)that his teeth were false.
By "false" I mean that they were all either capped or crowned, a little like my own.
Still couldn't pay you to come?
Overheard at the Black and White bash.
Mr Hooray Penguin, Tory MP, hands in his overcoat to a uniformed clerk.
“Good evening Mr Penguin. Will Mrs Penguin be joining you?
“No…she’s dead.”
“What did she die of?” asked the over familiar doorman.
“Gonorrhea.”
“But sir, nobody dies nowadays of Gonorrhea!”
“They bloody well do when they give it to me,” snorted the indignant Tory MP.
Bottom row second from left, aint she a gak banging cork snorting whore?
Has the Tory party got a thing for women with long hair and men with short hair?
Odd, isn't it?
Re top left - I wouldn't mind putting her over my knee and giving her a little spank. She looks like a right cheeky little minx!
Miaow!
Middle Left.
That's better! Everyone one eminently shaggable (apart from Dave and poor old Bryan of course)
Contrast that with the crab faced, ranting old bags in Labour.
I wouldn't shag any of them (apart from Dave and Bryan of course)
excellent. for the last few months, i had been toying with voting tory, or at least voting non-labour, on the ID cards issue, and on the basis that Labour are useless. however, seeing these pictures of spavined, chinless, inbred, primped goons and their drooling molls has made it a stone cold certainty that I will not only vote Labour, but I will do my best to ensure that everyone i know does so as well.
furthermore, i hate ken livingstone and his style of politics, but, again, this remionder of the sort of twerps who will cheer a boris victory has brought me a clarity of sorts. i will vote for Ken purely to ensure that this lot have a bad night.
cheers guido!
PS - before the old "you work for labour" stuff kicks in, I'm a fairly regular contributor, not a troll, don't work for labour, think this site is great and generally think the govt and most MPs are useless.
anon 1.39
You're not fooling anyone so get back in the bunker you tosser.
You can tell it's not a Labour do. There's not a fat bloater or gurning lezza in sight.
They all look pretty white to me
Yes, yes, no, no,
God no, yes, no, yes,
Tranny, no, no, man
Makes a change from some of ropy old bints you've had in the past.
ian dale's dildo,
don't hold back sir, I'd spank the fucker raw!
top left yes please.
Isn't the bottom left one of the bints from Trinny & Susannah?
Bottom right next to Mr Ferry is Amanda Wakely. She has always looked better with her hair over her face.
Rather then playing the "Which Bitch Would I Like To Shag, But Have Absolutely No Chance Of Doing So" game.
Which gets pretty boring quite quickly.
Its far more fun to play the "Which Bitch Would I Not Shag Under Any Conditions, As Even I Have Some Standards" game.
It is interesting to see that by the end of the night very few females seem to qualify for the distinction.
Also, by the time the cabs start arriving, absolutely none seem to.
Or is that just me?
Many slow-witted Yorkshiremen would chance their arms with this lot with the classic "Eeeh tha dun't sweat much for a fat lass, dost tha?" gambit. Clearly inappropriate.
The best opener for this lot would be the words of my good pal, a leading insolvency and corporate recovery expert in the Yorkshire area, Great High Panjandrum of the local square and compass mob , follower of Abu Abif. Start with a pop eyed stare at the breast region, a small drool, extend the tongue and slowly lick the upper lip whilst making slurping noises, stifle the ensuing beery belch and jump right in with " do you take it up the dirt box" - guaranteed to work every time!
Who is that sexy filly at the top-left?
Pretty much all of them, please! Except the two blokes of course! Who on earth would vote Labour after seeing this lot? Agreed. No-tie-Dave is a right tosser.
Oldham isn't in Yorkshire is it, or have they been fucking with the electoral boundaries AGAIN?
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