Gordon and Sarah's Weekend With Dave and Posh
Guido is at a loss as to what to say about the Beckhams and the Browns weekending together at Chequers. The Beckhams are not known for their intellectual pastimes. What does Gordon see in the footballing gay icon?
73 comments:
What does he see?
He see's votes! Natch
I can only assume he wanted someone to bum around with for the weekend.
That's Posh and Becks' careers over then. A weekend with Jonah Brown is bound to bring them a lifetime of bad luck.
"What first attracted you to millionaire Paul Daniels, Debbie?"
Jeeze, a weekend with those three together, holy shit, can there be a more nauseating thought, well, let's see who else will be there....are WE taxpayers paying for this....bollocks!!
Maybe the prospect of playing with "golden balls" got him excited?
Possibly he wishes to know Dave's secret padding methods?
That's his 'special relationship' with Dacre stuffed, then.
David, How do you bend it?
Perhaps this was a late birthday present for Gordo... something that should have been included in his ideal day?
As Gay Icon David likes to wear ballet shoes and knickerbockers. One can only suppose that he and Gordon will dress up for the weekend and go off rocking and a riding together.
I wonder what posh thinks about exogenous growth theories?
Now that David has been brainwashed (it to longer to find it than wash it!) by Tom Cruise about Scientology, Beckham is now promoting it to our MP.
"The Beckhams are not know[SIC] for their intellectual pastimes"
should be
The Beckhams are not known for their intellectual pastimes
cheers
Jon1
Wouldn't be surprised to find the Speaker has sold the exclusive photo rights of the weekend to Hello!
Marquee Mark
This is what comes from Gordon wishing for a weekend fully immersed in Victoria's Secrets for his birthday. Sarah invites the Beckhams over for a chinwag.
What a weekend..
" David you know you said we were spending the weekend with Gordon Ramsey"....well..
" They're here.. quick Gordon open a bottle."
"yes my sweet.Still or sparkling"
errm
"Oh, look David, Sarah gets Cosmopolitan too."
"Actually that's Gordons"
errmm
"I must tell you Victoria, Gordon just idolises David. He even wears Beckham Brand underwear."
" Actually , those are from my collection Sarah."
"So Sarah, what do you do?"
"Nothing really."
"That's the same as you Posh"
"I used to be quite a sportsman you know."
"So did I."
ermm ..
"We called him Romeo, after his father."
"That's intresting we called him John after his."
{whisper} You said he was a detective..
I said ..He looked a bit like Columbo..
Let's go Posh..
Already ? But you've only just arrived. Surely you'll stay for the photographers? Gordon got them in especially.
Gordon is not "know" (sic) for his intellectual pastimes either, unless you class fucking up the country as such. The man is a prize twat.
Fixed the known no know now. Happy?
Beckham and Brown: one's a metrosexual and the other's a homosexual. Both are attention seeking has-beens desperate for good publicity.
I'm sure they'll be bending over backwards to make it a successful weekend for both of them.
"Fixed the known no know now. Happy?"
More like Dozy, I think.
Anyway, Le Chequers Weekend must have been an ordeal - for all parties. WTF was the dinner-table conversation like? None of them are exactly the life and soul of the party - and certainly one of them is the Death of the Party.
Rather Golden Balls than Ed Balls in my book. Although he can leave that fucking weird wife of his in the States.
Just a thought: NR sponsor Newcastle, who need a mid field player, and Gordon bought himself the bank for his birthday. How about using some of that 50 billion from the tax payer to buy out the Galaxy contract. That will really dish the Libdem threat on Tyneside.
Who needs a spelling or grammar checker, eh, Guido?
You have a bunch of pedantic twats proof reading your blog for free!
Christ, we must all be very bored...
Becks, Posh & The Snotgobbler & still the cumulative IQ doesn't make more than a hundred.
That's a daisy chain I just don't want to think about.
GF, well gordon isn't exactly regarded as the T. E. Lawrence of nulab, but he didn't let that get between him and a weekend desert photo oportunity with the troops.
...On second thoughts perhaps Lawrence and gordon have got certain pecadillos in common !
That would be my personal hell trapped in a room with those four.
Gordo probably wanted to swap rocking horse stories with romeo or the other one and compare nappy experiences.
Well Gordon is a bit of a Gay Icon himself.
Gordon and Alan 1975...
Gordon and Greko T. 1981...
Gordon and Peter H. 1985...
Gordon and Graham 1990...
Gordon and Steve 1994...
Gordon and Graham. Again. 1997 ...
etc. etc. etc
Leave poor old GB alone - he is just looking for some intelligent conversation with someone at his own level.
Dave and Posh for number 11..better than the Balls anyday.
Can just imagine poor old Victoria ... "No, NO Cruz, just because Mr Nasty picks his nose doesn't mean you can as well, and Romeo ... get OFF that rocking horse, you don't know where its been or who's been on it".
I would imagine that the staff at Chequers all don rubber gloves for the post-Broon clean up.
What does Gordon see in the footballing gay icon?
The same as the Beckham mongs...HEAD FUCKING LINES!
Silly question Guido...not like you.
Come on Guido, you weren't born yesterday you know. Gordon needs a megarich publicity loving donor - right? No, not a sperm donor. Unless...
The same as Gay Dave sees in Tory Gays.
i can picture it now.
crucial free kick in dying few minutes of major international , gordon in the stadium looking on , beckham catches site of him , and gives the nod of man about to restore the uks pride.
he runs up swings his right leg , and the ball aided by a freak gust of wind goes right back up the field into the england net.
beckham publically burns an effergy of brown to off set sun readers demands for death penalty !!
yawn, let me know when something interesting happens.
washed up footballers and their washed up wifes famed for being thick as shit media whores visit the most unpopular PM of all time.
and they think this helps them in some way, time to sack your press adviser Gordon!
they all just look so desparate!
shudder the thought but this isn't some kind of VIP swingers scene thing going on is it? but it's all very strange nevertheless. why the fuck is 'image rights' dave doing stuff like subliminally advertising a copy of gordon's brown's book and offering such strong media support. inexplicable really.
hasn't anyone told beckham what a fucking black magic jonah brown is. what was his agent thinking of?
dave, let's get this one straight - gordon brown is a fucking satanist. it's just not cool hooking up and hanging out with devil worshippers.
As usual all you mongs have missed the point, Gordon has invited the Beckhams around so he can tap them up for a loan, such is the parlous state of our public finances.
I don't know which couple are the biggest media whores gaygordo(i dont like celeb culture) or push and becks who to be fair would turn up for an envelope opening.
Truely the worst pairing in history the conversation must have been riveting.The real pisser is we paid for it...CUNTS ALL OF THEM.
Cherie must be slim now cos its hard to eat when your laughing so much at mr&mr browns idiotic publicity stunts.
Meanwhile in Parliament our elected MPs voice their confidence in Mr Speaker.
When their expenses are under threat, democracy it seems is thrown out of the Westminster window.
Anonymous said...
"their washed up wifes famed for being thick as shit media whores"
Posh is unusual as WAGs go because she was wealthy and famous before he was. It hadn't been rag-to-riches for her - her family were wealthy and her father drove a Rolls.
There are a lot of similarities between the Mr. and Mrs. Balls and Mr. and Mrs. Goldenballs. Both husbands have difficulties stringing a sentence together (Has Guido still got that Blinky Balls video?) and their wives both have strange lollipop on a stick-type heads, are totally humourless and believe that the gibberish that they utter reflects profound truths.
9pm Friday night, a car somewhere in rural Buckinghamshire.
Fabio Capello: You want to be back in da team, yes no Davide?
Becks: Yus Boss.
Posh: 'Ere, it's wotsisname's 'ouse 'innit?
FC: We see. We see 'ow mucha you wanna be back in da team. You do me a little favour, I do you a little favour.
Becks: Yus Boss.
Posh: 'Ere, we're goin' up the drive, innit? Where's me entourage - I want me PR so's I get papped. 'Ee's got a big big 'ouse, he's gotta very big 'ouse in the cuntreh
FC: No, no, Vitoria, it's very - 'ow you say - securitate, capice?
Posh:(baffled) Cabbidge?.
FC (stopping the motor): Good. Get in da trunk. Davide, 'elp Vitoria in to da trunk.
Becks:Yus Boss.
(Muffled shrieks from Posh as she is tipped in to a cosy bed of used football socks. Becks attempts to get back in the rear door.)
FC: Very good Davide, but come, we will be great friends, brothers, sit next to me.
Becks: Yus Boss
(The unmarked black Maserati Quattroporte Executive GT growls back in to life, drowning Posh's squeaks. FC smiles at David, patting him reassuringly on the knee and then returning his meaty paw to the steering wheel.)
FC: We go see my friend, yes, Vitoria will be alright, it is better, she is safer in da trunk. I look after her. I take good care.
Becks: Yus Boss
(The car draws up to the front door. There are security officers, but they stand back and look in any direction but at the car. Capello opens his car door, gets out, then walks round and opens the door for Beckham, who is sitting there waiting for the valet parking to let him out.)
FC: Yes Davide, is now, is little favour, very little favour. No problemo.
Becks: Yus Boss.
(They crunch the last few feet the gravel and FC reaches for the bell-pull, but the baronial door swings open creakily of its own accord and two figures are standing there, illuminated from behind. Sarah and Gordon.)
GB: Good evening Fabio. (Sarah curtseys. GB briefly grimmaces at her.) We were expecting you.
FC: OK Davide, you run. They catch you, they can have you.
Becks sets off with an urgency he has not recently displayed. Gordon and Sarah chase him to the sound track of Yakkety Yak overlaid with FC's maniacle cackling.
Really who gives a flying fuck as to what this ghastly collection could get up to. Quite frankly I'd rather not let my imagination roam over the possibilities. The world now knows (even if nulabour won't admit it) that Mcfuckingbean is completely useless and no-one is going to be taken in by any opportunistic hobnobbing with overpaid 'celebrities', especially ex footballers. And if I was posh and becks I would be sorely tempted to attend just so's I could see for myself what a plonker Brown really is. It might be a slightly more interesting way of filling my time geting up and going to bed than getting into another new outfit every 4 hours.
this fiasco must have been planned a while ago as i seem to remember beckham being on the tv a few weeks ago telling us that Brown 'was a very good man and he's doing a very good job'.!!!!!!
i nearly smashed the telly !!!!!
cant wait for the thoughts of chairman david......he is such a good orator........maybe the chuckle bros. are going round next week?
bofl
At least we don't have to put up with Showbiz politics anymore...
Are we to be informed of all Chequers guests from now on?
i knew that i had seen it......
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/showbiz/showbiznews.html?in_article_id=518029&in_page_id=1773
and the icing on the cake from becks
"He's a very good man, he's a man that's looking after our country and he is doing a very good job."
what a twat.......
still, i suppose left footers must stick together!
bofl
Both second, or third raters! I'm hoping Brown is trying to get Beckham to play for (his beloved!)Raith Rovers. Then hopefully Brown will become owner/manager of the club and leave Westminster forever! I can dream can't I?
Expect to see some serious donations/loans and endorsements for NuLab from DB and, after a suitable interval, arise Sir Beckham of Dunfuck Hall. Also I hear that David brought some samples of his England kit as he had heard Gordon was keen to "lift his shirt". Gordon was also heard to discuss the technicalities of "playing in the hole behind the backs" and may have insisted on a practical demonstration. Fnarr fnarr!
oh dear tories 11% poll lead
broons lies getting a grip with the electorate.
hope labour trolls are are wondering if denying us a referndum was such a good idea .
aprt from the rock, rising crime , debt ridden , ferral society they have engineered .
for mr arrononvitch whilst catching criminals is very dear to your heart , the DNA database will not catch broon and co, and i think it is now possible he is criminal , fraud, deception.
also you fail to mention how certain ways of structuring society lead to criminal behavoir.
Jasper failed to declare position
A close aide of Ken Livingstone, suspended from his job after allegations of cronyism, failed to declare his chairmanship of a race-equality organisation that received thousands of pounds of taxpayers’ money.
Lee Jasper, Mr Livingstone’s adviser on police and equalities, became the head of Equanomics UK in September after Mr Livingstone requested that it receive £15,000 in taxpayers’ cash.
Documents obtained by The Times show that Mr Jasper failed to declare his position. Mr Livingstone’s allies concede privately that he broke the rules, as the Mayor of London seeks to distance himself from the race chief.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/politics/article3434502.ece
Perhaps McBean fancies a tattoo and needs to invite Thick & Thin to Hasbeen Hall so that he can get some expert advice, Well they don't seem to know much about anything else...
Continuing the theme, David told Gordon of his recent achievement in modelling sports underwear. However, he was surprised when he awoke in the night to find his private parts encased in an unfamiliar "Jock's trap". Tee-hee.
There is no mystery.
Gordon is a red-hot England fan. He is British and naturally wants to meet British heroes.
Hasn't he mentioned this?
Ever?
Fancy lowering themselves to this level, you thought they would have know better. I wonder what the Browns thought of it as well.
Charlotte Corday said...
"their wives ... believe that the gibberish that they utter reflects profound truths."
That is gibberish. You know very little about Sarah Brown.
Like most of the other posters, Becks will not have read 'Portaits of Courage'.
Whichever way you look at it, you gotta feel sorry for Sarah.
Anon. 8.12
My post compared Posh and Becks to Mr. and Mrs. Balls (Mrs. Balls AKA Yvette Cooper).
In moments of sympathetic lucidity when my ire at this shower unaccountably takes a rest I do occassionally feel for the families of the likes of Brown and Blair. I admit this is based on the assumption that their wives and children do respect and love them, which of course might not be true, they might also just be there for the journey (Bill and Hillary Clinton spring to mind). But it is likely that they are heroes to their kids.
And I know it's a weakness but I feel pangs of pity when I go off on an excoriating attack on Brown/Blair wondering what damage this might be doing to their families.
Pathetic isn't it?
Anonymong:
That is gibberish. You know very little about Sarah Brown.
8:02 AM, February 26, 2008
She's married to that snot gobbling bender twat,I would suggest thats all you need to know about Sarah Brown!
Leave it ahht mate leave it ahht Dave's a fucking good football player aint e.
Yer all jealous cos he's got a tasty bird, a few bob in the bank and er some nice tats and played for Engeeerlannd.
On the other hand he is a know-nothing plank from East London,who so worships the cult of celebrity that he would shag his dear old mum in the Big Brother house if it got him some more 'press' so perfect Labour voting material one would think.
Anon 8:02 am: You know very little about Sarah Brown
Only that she was stupid enough to marry Gordon
Anon. 8.02. My comment referred to Mrs. Balls AKA Yvette Cooper.
lola,
get a grip. and yes it is pathetic.
policy and implementation of policy are all that really matter in politics. new labour has failed on both counts. these useless cunts can't even fulfill their primary duty to protect the public.
you sound like a decent fellow who would be better served empathising with the many victims of this corrupt government's failed attempt to govern of this country. forget feeling sympathy for these zombies, think of stocking up on silver bullets and crucifixes instead.
NB it is vital you do not run out of silver bullets.
and yvette cooper was stupid enough to marry ed 'sweaty' balls.
note to self: will need a very large mini-bus to fit all these new labour spastics in!
it's like one flew over the cuckoo's nest with gordon brown as nurse ratchett, in total control, surrounded by imbeciles.
medication time!
Number 6 said:
''Yer all jealous cos he's got a tasty bird''
I've seen tastier birds with salmonella!!
Like Anon No 1 said: Votes
He, or his image consultants (now there's a poisoned chalice of a job if every I heard of one) obviously think that if the proles see him with King Becks and Queen Posh, they'll realise he's a decnt chap after all and vote for him in their loving millions.
Pathetic, innit?
Alzo a silver bullet is ze only ting permanently effective against lycanthropy, ze rising price of silver has rendered it too expensive to use against any ozer enemy. We at Van Helsing Industries are pleased to supply you wiz sharpened stakes und hammers, and remind you zat in an emergency zey can be crossed to make un effective crucifix. Alvays keep zome handy, yes.
Zummary from Kitco
Silver rose today (Friday), now at the highest point since 1980. The short term indicators are still mostly positive as the price is at the highest in a quarter of a century, the highest since silver soared to $50 in 1980. There are some similarities to the gold and silver market in 1979 and 1980 when silver soared to around $50 an ounce. Now, as then, the oil price rose to levels not seen before. Now also the value of the U.S. Dollar has been declining. There was uncertainty in the Middle East as there is now. One major exception is that U.S. interest rates were rising then as inflation hit double digits - that is not the case now as interest rates have been declining, not rising - if interest rates begin to rise the similarity to 1980 would be more complete.
Blindingly obvious why a poof PM should fancy a Gay Icon. What I don't understand is what Sarah sees in Victoria - no, surely not!
As to the Beckhams, Victoria has made a fortune out on no talent, so all credit to her and David of course, although not an intellectual great, plays sublime football. Why don't we judge him on that? After all that is his claim to fame. Do we judge Cameron on his football skills?
David Beckham plays sublime football? What planet does the previous anonymous enhabit: The Daily Planet? The Sun?
David Beckham used to be able to do a decent pass, once. Fergie knew what he was doing when he sold the model to Real Madrid, and Real Madrid knew what they were doing (using him for selling replica shirts).
Basically his football career has been on the slide for a long time.
Poor Becks is just the decoy, the sweaty Scot wants to give Posh a little rectal massage. After all she has a very boyish figure.
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