Oh more Ed more!! God you're so big, you dirty bastard Oh God, it hurts so good, ooh that's better, now who's next and what position do you want me in?
Just heard on the World at One, or whatever it is on R4 at lunchtime, that G Brown has seemingly got off his plane and gone straight to a school - why?
Is he incapable of going anywhere outside Downing Street with out dashing through the first set of school gates he sees. I think there is a strong case for an ASBO if this continues - poor children; they need protection.
gay gordon fancied doing a 'Dashing White Sargent' at the Christmas celie, but none of them would have him, so it was back to the old Warren Zevron, 'Wherewolves of London', impression in front of the mirror.
And now, the end is near; And so I face the final curtain. My friend, Ill say it clear, Ill state my case, of which Im certain.
Ive lived a life thats full. Ive traveled each and evry highway; And more, much more than this, I did it my way.
Regrets, Ive had a few; But then again, too few to mention. I did what I had to do And saw it through without exemption.
I planned each charted course; Each careful step along the byway, But more, much more than this, I did it my way.
Yes, there were times, Im sure you knew When I bit off more than I could chew. But through it all, when there was doubt, I ate it up and spit it out. I faced it all and I stood tall; And did it my way.
Ive loved, Ive laughed and cried. Ive had my fill; my share of losing. And now, as tears subside, I find it all so amusing.
To think I did all that; And may I say - not in a shy way, No, oh no not me, I did it my way.
For what is a man, what has he got? If not himself, then he has naught. To say the things he truly feels; And not the words of one who kneels. The record shows I took the blows - And did it myyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
The sandwich I have in my hands is the biggest and best that we in New Labour can produce. This world beating delicacy was produced after record investment in real terms into what you, the British people, want for lunch.
Why won't the electorate believe me,everything I do is for them,I mean Iv'e given them floods,pestilence,a run on a bank,no GE,no referendum,taken the 10% tax from the low paid,lost 2 cd's with 25mil names,kept the military poor but spent loads on the MOD offices,upped petrol tax,HIPS, all in 6months just what more can I do.
Pagliacci (Clowns) is an opera consisting of a prologue and two acts written and composed by Ruggero Leoncavallo. It recounts the tragedy of a jealous.....
The Cabinet team were the clear winners of ITV's Give Us a Clue Christmas Special with the PM's superb interpretation of the little-known children's book "Gordon And The Invisible Butt-Plug" by Rev. W Awdry.
The best joke, although totally true, is that Bottler Brown has given away copies of his book on 'courage' to schoolkids in Africa. Cant sell them here!
My fear is that when he next goes to Iraq he will give the troops more copies of the book.
eco-warrior (excerpt from historic "who needs helicopters" speech
said...
Mr Gordon Brown, Prime Minister:
Why in heaven's name am I being accused of criminally neglecting our armed forces? In recognition of their bravery, I have made arrangement for special dispensation to be made in the case of all British servicemen and women who currently serve in either the Iraq or Afghanistan conflicts - and I envisage a limited relaxation of my proposed new environmental legislation in order that military personnel may each be issued with one tax-exempt plastic bag to facilitate their transportation home from the theatre of War.
"I had a dream When I was young A dream of sweet illusion A glimpse of hope and unity And visions of one sweet union But a cold wind blows And a dark rain falls And in my heart it shows Look what theyve done to my dreams..."
Oh Great Lord Lucifer grant me the power to smite my enemies with fire and brimstone. Give me some of your mighty power so that I might cleanse the land of those who refuse to do my bidding.
Tragedy When the feelings gone and you can't go on It's tragedy When the morning cries and you don't know why It's hard to bear With no-one to love you you're Goin' nowhere
"Prime Minister, regarding the copy of the Northern Rock loan agreement you asked to see; HM Treasury have stuck it on a CD-Rom and are sending it in the post to you tonight....."
"MmmmmMmmmMmmph Gordon, can't you hurry up. I've got the children to put to bed and I promised I'd phone my mother" "Just keep sucking, Sarah, I'm nearly there" "MmmMmmMmm gasp MmmMmmMmm gasp" "Nearly Sarah" "MmphMmphgaspMmphgasp" "Yes nearly" "MmphgaspMmphgasp" "Oh God, yesYesYESSSS" "Gasp hawk (spit) Now go and have a wash. I can't wait till we're back in London. I always thought Ugandan relations were something you had with somebody else's wife" "?"
Wait till I get my hands on the stupid fucker who merged the Inland Revenue with Customs and Excise. Or the idiot who relieved the Bank of England of their regulatory duties. Or the tosser who created a consumer boom out of unsecured borrowing. Or the traitor who took money away from the armed forces while they were fighting two wars at the same time.
At morning prayers in the Commons, Gordon invokes teh prayer of 'Blame me not, thou great Jehovah' - all faithfully recorded in the Book of (the Son of) Mansard.
butt-holing bend-down brownite bunker boys
said...
Gay Gordo "For what I am about to receive may the Lord make me truly grateful......that's it, now come on Ed, you dirty bastard, ram it up there where the sun don't shine, big boy!"
...and so, ladies and gentlemen, by a digital miracle I, a modest son of the manse, can hold the entire UK citizens database with all you ever needed to know about everyone, in my two hands...good god its gone!
NICK ROBINSON: ...and despite what damage the Tories may believe they've inflicted, the man inside number 10 remains, according to my sources, calm, focused and up for the fight. Back to you, Huw.
The death throws of Gordon Brown. Having decided to end it all Gordon Brown bids farewell to this cruel and heartless world. He then takes an overdose of laxatives. Truly his nappy runneth over.
"Lord, as you instructed I have turned to the good book and I must say, reading again the story of 8 people who showed courage against all types of adversity, prejudice, danger....derision....cynicism.....people who wanted to threaten the longest unbroken period of economic growth since 325BC....."(contd for 2 hours)
Dennis McCunt on the government's PM programme just now, talking of the new Aussie PM "....and he and Gordon Brown will spend some time rapping on various economic issues." Honest to God.Rapping. Not invent. Who do these cunts think they are talking to.
And, on Iraq (enthusiastically) "... he (the new cobber-in-charge) is not any kind of a peacenik...." Thank goodness for that Mr McShane, wouldn't want any of that nasty old peace breaking-out now, would we. Who the fuck votes for people like McShane. May the good Lord send him and them rectal cancer before he gets his pension.
Stanislav. Re McShane, it gets worse. He believes that not only does 'Kev' Rudd remind him of Blair in 1997, but Rudd's also going to get rid of gesture politics (which surely have to be mutually exclusive). I got to the bit about Gordon 'Rapping' and I had to turn off...
The democratic process sometimes throws up freaks like McShane, but fret not, his reward awaits in Brussels.
(in response to Daid Cameron's latest 'proclamation')
"Why ye nae see that I am too a Libertariarian (och Ed, I cannae spell the word). Crivens, I even represent the constituency where Adam Smith was bord."
146 comments:
Well, his balls were this big, and I had to open my mouth this wide.
I'm just a Sweet Transvestite
from Transexual
Transylvaniaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
He's singing,Please release me let me go the public don't love me anymore.sung to Frank Ifield's old tune.
Oh god,why doesn't anybody believe me.
Those disks were put in the post honestly,do you think I would behave like a used car salesman
Help help Tony please help me these horrible people are shouting at me.
And as he was crucified Gordon cried "Tony, Tony ... why hast thou forsaken me!"
"Gordon Browns body lies a mouldering in its grave,
Gordon Browns body lies a mouldering in its grave...!!
Oh more Ed more!! God you're so big, you dirty bastard Oh God, it hurts so good, ooh that's better, now who's next and what position do you want me in?
'Room for 2 more roosting chickens.'
"arrhhh that hurts.... not another cock up!"
Mila kura si planina
Oh Andrew that feels wonderful you are my favourite BBC hack
Just heard on the World at One, or whatever it is on R4 at lunchtime, that G Brown has seemingly got off his plane and gone straight to a school - why?
Is he incapable of going anywhere outside Downing Street with out dashing through the first set of school gates he sees. I think there is a strong case for an ASBO if this continues - poor children; they need protection.
Northern Crock, Diskgate, 9 points behind in the polls? I don't believe it!
/meldrew
gay gordon fancied doing a 'Dashing White Sargent' at the Christmas celie, but none of them would have him, so it was back to the old Warren Zevron, 'Wherewolves of London', impression in front of the mirror.
Come over here Ed, you big bastard, I'm ready for a bit of deep throat.
When he grows up he want's to be an opera singer,he's already had plenty of practice spinning labour's record and now he wants to sing about it.
After watching the History Channel, gordon felt all he needed was a small moustache for people to buy into his dream for a 1,000 year nulab reich.
The Invisble Man denies filching allegations
try as he might, Gordon simply couldn't fit the massive imaginary pie into his mouth. Now if only JP was still around...
transfattyacid: I think you mean feltching.
Christ I don't believe I made that correction
Oh my god, I think I've pulled my brains out with that snotter.
In a rare candid moment, Gordon Brown shows reporters his preferred posture at meetings of the European Council.
Gordondammerung.
"So you open your mouth like this and pull the trigger just so."
Well keep the red flying here !!
i thank you ladies an gentlemen ah ha
the
red despot spotter
And now, the end is near;
And so I face the final curtain.
My friend, Ill say it clear,
Ill state my case, of which Im certain.
Ive lived a life thats full.
Ive traveled each and evry highway;
And more, much more than this,
I did it my way.
Regrets, Ive had a few;
But then again, too few to mention.
I did what I had to do
And saw it through without exemption.
I planned each charted course;
Each careful step along the byway,
But more, much more than this,
I did it my way.
Yes, there were times, Im sure you knew
When I bit off more than I could chew.
But through it all, when there was doubt,
I ate it up and spit it out.
I faced it all and I stood tall;
And did it my way.
Ive loved, Ive laughed and cried.
Ive had my fill; my share of losing.
And now, as tears subside,
I find it all so amusing.
To think I did all that;
And may I say - not in a shy way,
No, oh no not me,
I did it my way.
For what is a man, what has he got?
If not himself, then he has naught.
To say the things he truly feels;
And not the words of one who kneels.
The record shows I took the blows -
And did it myyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
(At this moment Gordovski was snapped)
The sandwich I have in my hands is the biggest and best that we in New Labour can produce. This world beating delicacy was produced after record investment in real terms into what you, the British people, want for lunch.
I call it "The Emperor's new sandwich."
Anon 2:08pm
Surely should be;
"The record shows, I took a blow
from Andrew Maaaarrrrr, Wey-Heyyyyy!"
Why won't the electorate believe me,everything I do is for them,I mean Iv'e given them floods,pestilence,a run on a bank,no GE,no referendum,taken the 10% tax from the low paid,lost 2 cd's with 25mil names,kept the military poor but spent loads on the MOD offices,upped petrol tax,HIPS, all in 6months just what more can I do.
Pagliacci (Clowns) is an opera consisting of a prologue and two acts written and composed by Ruggero Leoncavallo. It recounts the tragedy of a jealous.....
re well i tried 2:15
dont forget the continued GeryMandleson of parliment , lying to the public and the programming of his future marxist robots.
Let the Challenge begin!!
thanks
red despot spotter
The Cabinet team were the clear winners of ITV's Give Us a Clue Christmas Special with the PM's superb interpretation of the little-known children's book "Gordon And The Invisible Butt-Plug" by Rev. W Awdry.
#What kind of fool am I,
Who never learned to count?
It seems that I'm the only one
I give a toss about...
What premiership is this?
What kind of man?
Is Tony Harold Wilson to my Callaghan...?
What kind of lips are these
That always took the piss
That tried a desp'rate trawl for votes
that left me alone like this...
Why can't I get a grip
Like Ed Balls says I can
And maybe then I'll know what kind of fool I am.
What kind of clown am I?
Why did I wait before?
Why did I spend my golden days as just the chancellor?
Why do they hate me more
Than that god-damn Blair man?
It's too late now
They know what kind of fool I am...#
(with apologies to Leslie Bricusse and Anthony Newley...)
If I were Gordo I would be deeply worried.
His drywank jawdrop has worsened and has apparently spread to his chins. They are saggier than Jacqui Smith's funbags.
'How the fuck am I supposed to catch it? I've only got one fucking eye!'
Now is the winter of our disks' content, made glorious summer by this son of the Manse.
OMG my pants are on Fire!
Tuscan did you ever get that teeshirt off that Guido Fella and will we see the piccy's on your blog
The homosexual prime minister asks God is it cos I is Gay ?
Man astonished by his own ability to make shadows in the shape of animals.
'How many records lost? Twenty-five million! I can't fucking count that many on all my fingers!'
The best joke, although totally true, is that Bottler Brown has given away copies of his book on 'courage' to schoolkids in Africa.
Cant sell them here!
My fear is that when he next goes to Iraq he will give the troops more copies of the book.
Gordon discovers that God has decided that re-run of the 'Plagues for Egypt' episode in the Bible is in order.
So when will Gordo get in his chariot and try chasing the Cameroon across the Red sea?
" heaven knows I'm miserable now "
Man confronted by Sooty and Sweep naked horror.
For a moment, Gordon's worries about HMRC, Northern Rock, the Polls etc are all forgotten, as Ed takes him to 'that special place'...
Unease around Cabinet Table as Gordon entertains ministers with his David Bellamy impression.
The PM has a vision - of a man wearing a Bullingdon Dining Club suit entering his home!
"The hands of destiny close in on Gordon's throat
Mr Gordon Brown, Prime Minister:
Why in heaven's name am I being accused of criminally neglecting our armed forces? In recognition of their bravery, I have made arrangement for special dispensation to be made in the case of all British servicemen and women who currently serve in either the Iraq or Afghanistan conflicts - and I envisage a limited relaxation of my proposed new environmental legislation in order that military personnel may each be issued with one tax-exempt plastic bag to facilitate their transportation home from the theatre of War.
Im a catatrophe get me out of here!
A "Shakespearean tragedy" is unfolding, muttered a Labour backbencher darkly. "You just know how this one is going to end ..."
from A rising note of panic surrounds Number 10
well your honour,
I was knelt under the elephant like this.
But it is of course all a misunderstanding.
GB thought he might try his luck at being England's goalkeeper instead.
Good God Milliband, I can't see you any more!
News reaches Gordon that Ronnie Cohen thinks Cameron is "quite nice fellow".
Why me? "Well laddie, you're here (and you sooo wanted the job)"
My lipstick is the wrong colour help me.
"... one does begin to wonder if Gordon Brown is cut out for the top job".
- Adam Boulton, 23 November 2007
'Tony' in Palestine says: I told you I'd get you back, Gordon.nomflxc
"My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?"
After his latest bout of oral sex, a dithering Gordon is undecided as to whether to spit or swallow.
Gordon Brown on the verge of a nervous breakdown.
Gordon squats down, mouth ajar, behind a straining Mark Oaten in their very own version of the Lib/Lab pact.
"I had a dream
When I was young
A dream of sweet illusion
A glimpse of hope and unity
And visions of one sweet union
But a cold wind blows
And a dark rain falls
And in my heart it shows
Look what theyve done to my dreams..."
(One Vision - Queen)
Goodbye cruel world.
"Neocons bring Brown back into line."
I'll get their bloody gonads and Rip em offfffffffffffffffffffffff, Bastards.
Oh Great Lord Lucifer grant me the power to smite my enemies with fire and brimstone. Give me some of your mighty power so that I might cleanse the land of those who refuse to do my bidding.
Anonymous said...
Tuscan did you ever get that teeshirt off that Guido Fella and will we see the piccy's on your blog
2:31 PM, November 23, 2007
Better than a T shirt, a book. I will be pictured reading it when I get back to Tuscany and I reactivate my temporarily suspended (by me) blog.
"I hold in my hands all the money Northern Rock have paid back and I consider the matter finished, like my prospects."
Tragedy
When the feelings gone and you can't go on
It's tragedy
When the morning cries and you don't know why
It's hard to bear
With no-one to love you you're
Goin' nowhere
"Prime Minister, regarding the copy of the Northern Rock loan agreement you asked to see; HM Treasury have stuck it on a CD-Rom and are sending it in the post to you tonight....."
Gordo sings Happy Talk by Captain Sensible.
".............
You'll do it my way"
"MmmmmMmmmMmmph Gordon, can't you hurry up. I've got the children to put to bed and I promised I'd phone my mother"
"Just keep sucking, Sarah, I'm nearly there"
"MmmMmmMmm gasp MmmMmmMmm gasp"
"Nearly Sarah"
"MmphMmphgaspMmphgasp"
"Yes nearly"
"MmphgaspMmphgasp"
"Oh God, yesYesYESSSS"
"Gasp hawk (spit) Now go and have a wash. I can't wait till we're back in London. I always thought Ugandan relations were something you had with somebody else's wife"
"?"
GORDON: Lord, help me! What can I do to get out of this mess?
GOD: Gordon, you must repent and change your ways. No more spin, look after the soldiers and nurses, consult your colleagues more.
GORDON: Mr Speaker, I'll take no lessons from the bearded gentleman above!!
A Marr a day helps you work, rest and play ...
Until I met my Sarah I honestly thought sex was a pain in the arse.
Anymong 4:05
MADE MY DAY!!!!!!!!!
Wait till I get my hands on the stupid fucker who merged the Inland Revenue with Customs and Excise. Or the idiot who relieved the Bank of England of their regulatory duties. Or the tosser who created a consumer boom out of unsecured borrowing. Or the traitor who took money away from the armed forces while they were fighting two wars at the same time.
Oh Jacqui!!! YOu really need to keep those out of view
It feels as if you are this wide. Its great
SKY BREAKING NEWS: Scotsman caught in passionate clinch with the invisible man.
...long to-oo rei-eign oooover us
Go-od save this queeeeeeeeeeeeeen.
At morning prayers in the Commons, Gordon invokes teh prayer of 'Blame me not, thou great Jehovah' - all faithfully recorded in the Book of (the Son of) Mansard.
Gordo prepares for a Mark Oaten moment.
"PM, the chief vet's here. He says that there's nothing he can do this time and the rocking horse will have to be put down."
sings .... "I gotta a feeling twenty-one's gonna be a good year"
A disc, a disc my kingdom for a disc......
Gordon steadies himself for a winter of dick's contents.....
Hey Marr, do you like my Johnny Weismuller impression? AAaaaaayyeeaaayyyeeaaayyyyeeeaaaayyyeea. Now where's that Jane woman, I need a cup of tea.
Gay Gordo "For what I am about to receive may the Lord make me truly grateful......that's it, now come on Ed, you dirty bastard, ram it up there where the sun don't shine, big boy!"
BBC News:
Gordon "Suicidal" after England fail to qualify for Euro 2008
Will the COCK UP fit?
Gordon celebrates Croatia's third Goal just before giving Tony "my penis is a mountain" Henry, a quick gobblin.
Meanwhile the “junior” official from HMCR, has been found at Wembley playing in goal for England. Claimed he had got lost in the post.
My people,I want tractor production up by 5% in my next 5 year plan
dirty european socialist shits himself.
anon 4.05
winner by a mile
A horse a horse my kingdom for a rocking horse!
...and so, ladies and gentlemen, by a digital miracle I, a modest son of the manse, can hold the entire UK citizens database with all you ever needed to know about everyone, in my two hands...good god its gone!
GORDON: Sarah,Oh Sarah...I had a dream....
...such a sweet dream...
...I dreamt I was the Prime Minister.
SARAH...that was no dream, that was a fucking nightmare. Now drink your milk and go back to sleep.
GORDON: Sarah,Oh Sarah...I had a dream....
...such a sweet dream...
...I dreamt I was the Prime Minister.
SARAH...that was no dream, that was a fucking nightmare. Now drink your milk and go back to sleep.
OK Mark - let it drop
Gordon's new playmate went down faster than Northern Rock.
NICK ROBINSON: ...and despite what damage the Tories may believe they've inflicted, the man inside number 10 remains, according to my sources, calm, focused and up for the fight. Back to you, Huw.
After his successful Ugandan trip, and a short journey from Northolt airfield, Gordon discovered himself in the secure psychiatric wing at Broadmoor.
The bogey was this big.
It took ages to eat it.
I'l remember it forever
Kill a squadie vote labour
Gordon Brown sings Nessun Dorma from his 3 cd set, The Encryption Coda.
"Ah geev up with that bluidy Guido, tuu cluvva ba' huf he is, d'ye thunk he ken smull a rat oova me brund noo 'duurrty euro socialist' handle, ye ken?
Tony tony where for art though tony.
fuck off cyclops the bank slayer
Quando viene sera ed il sole tramonta,
mi assale la malinconia...
When evening comes and the sun sets,
I am assailed by melanchony......
Two hands one cup
Brown's just been fucked on Newsnight. Even Andrew Rawnsley thinks he's floundering.
A vision, A vision, Ed Balls for a Vision!
Ok Andrew, I promise will be as gentle as you were with me during the "bottling the election" interview.
Allaaaaah!
"where's my melon?"
(cf http://sc.tri-bit.com/Hitler_Melon )
"I'm telling ye Dougie, Ed's knob was this big but I got the whole lot in my mouth by opening wide like this!
Hanky quickly ed. Snotty hands.
Ed: I see Heineken the gerbil's one good form.
The death throws of Gordon Brown. Having decided to end it all Gordon Brown bids farewell to this cruel and heartless world. He then takes an overdose of laxatives. Truly his nappy runneth over.
"Lord, as you instructed I have turned to the good book and I must say, reading again the story of 8 people who showed courage against all types of adversity, prejudice, danger....derision....cynicism.....people who wanted to threaten the longest unbroken period of economic growth since 325BC....."(contd for 2 hours)
Gordo, pictured moments before the monthly Bukkake session gets underway.
Gordon was sure he was just sucking Andrew Marr's cock, but when he woke up it was all a dream.
It's not over until the Fat Bastard sings...
Gordon Brown:
"For god's sake. Just stop asking me about the up-dated military equipment. It's in the post."
Dennis McCunt on the government's PM programme just now, talking of the new Aussie PM "....and he and Gordon Brown will spend some time rapping on various economic issues." Honest to God.Rapping. Not invent. Who do these cunts think they are talking to.
And, on Iraq (enthusiastically) "... he (the new cobber-in-charge) is not any kind of a peacenik...." Thank goodness for that Mr McShane, wouldn't want any of that nasty old peace breaking-out now, would we. Who the fuck votes for people like McShane. May the good Lord send him and them rectal cancer before he gets his pension.
Andy yes, yes, don't stop blowing my courage.
"McShane" my arse. He's about as Scottish as my Siamese cat.
The east european cunt is Rasputin's great-grandson.
Resistance is useless you English bastards.I will exterminate you all!
Stanislav. Re McShane, it gets worse. He believes that not only does 'Kev' Rudd remind him of Blair in 1997, but Rudd's also going to get rid of gesture politics (which surely have to be mutually exclusive). I got to the bit about Gordon 'Rapping' and I had to turn off...
The democratic process sometimes throws up freaks like McShane, but fret not, his reward awaits in Brussels.
Dear Mr Kelly
Yes. Throw-up. Like vomit.
Love from Stanislav
(in response to Daid Cameron's latest 'proclamation')
"Why ye nae see that I am too a Libertariarian (och Ed, I cannae spell the word). Crivens, I even represent the constituency where Adam Smith was bord."