Friday Caption Contest
LibDems Should Back Tory Education Policy - LibDem Voice
New Labour's Charge Sheet - Maurice Saatchi
Brown's Reverse Canute Effect - Stumbling & Mumbling
Carter v Heywood during Wimbledon - Red Box
Political Bloggers: the New Opposition? - Guardian
Labour Suicidally Corrupt - Peter Oborne
LibDems to Unilaterally Disclose Expenses - LibDem Voice
Tory MP Puts Mistress on the Payroll - Recess Monkey
Think Tank Round-Up - Cassilis
100 comments:
Look over there, you see that major-league asshole?
Even Bush recognises the spelling mistake on the streaker's buttocks.
Tantric Wang Adjustment:You can't get that on the National Health!
Hu Jintao gets granted a sneaky audience with the Dalai, but after donning an ill-fitting Bush mask.
Dalai: (Thinks) What a winker!
D. L. 'Mr President, you've forgotten to leave a big enough space for James Purnell.'
Bush. 'What's the difference between a blanket and Nu Labour?'
D. L. 'Shit sticks to a blanket.'
Bush gave the photographer a wink as he cheekily patted the Dalai Lama's arse
George was very pleased with himself. He knew it was quite a coup having Yoko Ono at the White House.
Paparazzi achieve double scoop: not only is Condoleezza caught without her wig, but we also discover she wears specs.
George: "You all knew Blair was my poodle - now meet my Tibetan Terrier"
"Yo Lama! The thing is what they need to do is to get China, to get Burma to stop doing this shit and it’s over"
Mike Reid is saying "when is the only time you should wink at a homosexual?" before miming sighting down a rifle scope. And his mate is just winking because it is the only word he understood.
or "a pair of tits"
gape, Gordon, gape wins already surely. One of the few things to make me laugh outright. If I'd been drinking a cup of tea right then, it would have been all over the monitor.
George Bush and the Dalai Lama perform rather fruity, but frighteningly accurate, impersonations of Britain's notoriously mincing Prime Minister.
GWB: Yes, the Dali Llama gives a great hand job
Dalai Lama falls for the old "Pull my finger" gag.
Bush: ....and if you push really hard you can squeeze one out.
Dalai Lama: you've just followed through, haven't you.
Karma's a bitch
Mr Lama's fixed it so I ain't comin' back as an insect.
Dalai Lama: Let us follow the path of Nirvana.
Bush: Yeah, I've heard that Courtney Love is hot stuff.
BUSH: Now you've got the uniform, we can pack you off to Guantanamo.
Heh heh, this will really piss the slitty eyed chow mien eating pricks off.
GWB: "Now say hello to the boys and girls"
DL: "Gottle of geer!"
Bush: "In the photo we're gonna look like one of those Pushmi-Pullyas. You know - those two-headed Lamas."
Due to the significant premium requiried by the photographers insurance company to cover accidental and unusual damage, Margaret Beckett was asked to stand down from this years Ugly Cunts of the World Unite, photo shoot.
findings of enquiry questioned after claims in new report from blog competition standards commissioner that spot-the-difference contests are not any easier than ten years ago
"Dunno who this guy in the towel is, but he's sure gonna be impressed when he sees this Llama we're flyin' in from Dehli."
OR
"Touch me there again and I'll poke the other eye out, too."
Dalai Lama:
I told you you would come back as a chimp!
Hey these North Koreans are a breeze!
nominees eagerly await the nobel peace price announcement after pundits declare this year too close to call
Hey these North Koreans are a breeze!
The Dalai Chama?
GB: (with a wink) .......and can you thrown in the crispy seaweed for free with that?
DL: This non violence can be a ball buster
I have got this Lama in my sights.
"Say that again and I'll poke your other fucking eye out. Capiche?"
Yo Gordo thats a hell of a fancy dress outfit.
George is a big winker
Yo Blair! What's with the dark glasses and the dress ?
Bush: "I have problems with Chinese Imports"
DL: "You too!"
I told the President that if I could spit in his eye it would absolve him of all his sins.
Dalai Lama 'Ooh, Georgy, you could have warmed your finger and put some KY Jelly on it before popping it in there..!'
DL: In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king
See the love-bites on his arm? That was me, baby.
'Bush hopper, you have much to learn.'
"You know it ain't that hard being the Dalai Lama...." The Dalai Lama said slowly reaching down towards Bush.
"But it sure is hard being the President." Replied George with a wink.
Dalai Lama loves George's Gordon brown impersonation.
At casting sessions for Up the Occupied Territories, the US President is well chuffed at getting the part of Senator Bernie Bush and palpably moist with anticipation at being backed up by a re-incarnated Frankie Howerd, who will play Boltio, his Chief-of-Staff...Oooh no Missus!...Titter ye not!
Bush - If you shut one eye and squint real hard it kinda looks like a WMD
New Wonder Bra ad campaign slammed by regulators
DL: And I thought being invaded by China was a pain in the arse.
The little yellow bastard has cum in my eye.
President Bush ushers the Dalai Lama onto a rendition flight to China for re-education (and hard labour).
The Dalai Lama joins George Bush in a roasting of Gordon Brown
dali lama: psst george do you think the chinese are going to accept religous automomy
george bush: i dunno know ,but there miss china sure does seem to be heading to some form of negiotiation .
thanks
red despot spotter
Agreed, then: a Big Yak with fries. Or I'll have ya tortured.
What George would be thinking if he had a brain to think with.
"Why does the right side of my body not seem to know what the left side is doing anymore. Its as if my mind is being controlled by someone?"
Although George's gut feelings on Chinese/American/Tibetan diplomatic relationships are.
"When is my fucking lunch arriving?"
then
"Shit!! I need a piss"
then
"Fuck this late lunch shiiiit. I thought we had that Brown fucker Brown on call to deal with all this 'men in dresses' stuff."
This Special Rendition, see, is kinda like what you call re-birth. Only it ain't absolutely necessary to die first!
Dalai Lama: "George, you should have gone to Specsavers"
He dosen't know it yet but I'm handing him over to the chinies tomrow...
Aw shucks Arnie. Just 'cos I got you all that disaster relief didna mean you had to go an' get me a Dalai Lama-gram to say thank you!
DL: Fuck my sainted ringpiece how does it take 10,580 beeboid kiddies to produce that stream of ignorant patronising arse seepage, scuse my fucking language!
GB: Ok God, calm down, I'll bomb beeboidistan for ya
DL: Fucking cocks
dali lama thinks:I wish i had a whole country of slaves devoted to my wellbeing like i used to have and this stupid fucker still has.
The President:
So I jump ship in Hong Kong and make my way over to Tibet, and I get on as a looper at a course over in the Himalayas. A looper, you know, a caddy, a looper, a jock. So, I tell them I'm a pro jock, and who do you think they give me? The Dalai Lama, himself. Twelfth son of the Lama. The flowing robes, the grace, bald... striking. So, I'm on the first tee with him. I give him the driver. He hauls off and whacks one - big hitter, the Lama - long, into a ten-thousand foot crevasse, right at the base of this glacier. Do you know what the Lama says? Gunga galunga... gunga, gunga-galunga. So we finish the eighteenth and he's gonna stiff me. And I say, "Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know." And he says, "Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness." So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.
Hey, this guy comes to dinner at the White House and he says I can have a free Tibet. I think it's a Korean car.
A Dalai Lama is for life, not just for Christmas
If you close one eye and look sideways he looks like Dick Cheyne.
Hey, this guy dodged the draft as well.
Some a these Afghans can speak American.
Ah Soo!! Now understand meaning of nod and wink!
Reporter: "Mr President can you confirm or deny that they've discovered oil in Tibet?"
anon 8:40pm - one of the greatest films of the C20th.
One from the archives (ref: George Brown circa 1965)
Bush: Gee, lovely lady in orange, will you dance this waltz with me?
Dalai Lama: No, Mr. President, I will not for three reasons.
One: You appear to have fallen off the wagon.
Two: It is not a waltz. It is the Tibetan National Anthem.
And three: I am the Dalai Lama.
DUBJA AND THE BUDJA
George, gripping one end of the orange cloth as the Dalai Lama gets up to leave, says: "Have you ever been WKD"
Believe me boys, Dolly gives great head.
Daily Llama: .....sitting on a rocking horse wearing a nappy.
Bush: He's my bitch now.
He says Lama, I say Osama
He just shaved the whole thing off
hey gordon dont wait up, i got me a new bitch now.
Look who I got to deliver my takeaway.
He doesn't know what I know!
Bush: I love you long time
Eye spy with his little eye, something beginning with "Idiot"
Bush: Have you seen that video of *****?
GB. Tibetistan, do we own that?
I gave him a lousy leather jacket -and he gave me a kilo of the finest Nepalese Temple Ball - who's dumb now???
Dali Lama: Don't look at me you voted for him!
DL: So we believe, if you bad man, you come back as monkey, or even worse.
GWB: Oh boy. I've finally found a country I want nothing to do with.
whilst i hope that mon cartoon will picture clegg offering a handbag fight with cameron, oh yes cleggs going to give dave a lesson on liberal conservativeism , i bet dave must be crapping himself at the thought of another tufty club clone wanting to take prime spot in the cocnut shy .
come on the clegg after three , ill huff and ill puff and ill blow your straw house down , oh shit its made of titanium , run for it !!.
thanks red despot spotter (new sign in will be up tommorow)
we are rapists. want some rape action?
I thought bbcpioneers was funnier than the dreary bollocks the beeb pretends is entertainment, but was the paxman-mandelson apology more paxoprudery than paxoarselicken I wonder.
If I close my eyes, maybe the Chinese wont see me
Putting the warmonger image Tibet
GB: Hey! That little chinese bastard just spat in my eye.
DL: Well what do you expect, George?
We just gay sexed each others arse holes and we did not use lube either!
Yo! Lama
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