Comment Control
The comments are getting out of control again. Here is a reminder about the policy. Stop boring on. Guido will be deleting liberally and possibly putting comment moderation back on. The constant c**t calling is going to get deleted. We know that already.The comments are supposed to be entertaining, not ranting witless drivel. Special attention to 'Moko' who complained that he was being "censored" - no you bored Guido senseless. Here is a snapshot of your comment log from yesterday:
So expect to be deleted. Now, where is my coffee?
54 comments:
That Moko is such a cunt.
You are amongst a few bloggers that have this problem. On one hand it's fortunate to have so many commenters and people interested in your blog, but inevitably when this happens you also attract a degree of "ranting witless drivel". I admire the stand you take on it, which I hope will help keep this blog entertaining.
Other sites don't have the same approach and I constantly get bored while reading their comments.
Well done.
A timely reminder, Guido! I was amused by bedehouse's (9.12 p.m.)complaint in the 'GO! GO! GOING!' thread that:
"Demonising Cherie is just a diversion suckers."
Bedehouse seemed to think that we should be dissecting GB's turgid offering in minute detail. What the hell does (s)he think this site is for? "A diversion" is exactly what we're about.
Guido, funny how no-one's picked up on Mandleson's subtle(!) attempt at character assasination of Brown this morning!?
Fawquez, if you are going to wield the knife then slash with flair and purpose.
Cut the bores and paste all their tedium as a job lot into Comment is Free.
Then organise a spot the difference contest between their drivel and the particular brand of tedium served up by the bovine herd of Guardian 'writers'.
I think ee may struggle to discern which particular liberal toss-pot is which.
Just read your reminder. Not much point in discouraging Anonymous posts when everyone can post as "Peter Hitchens".
nick robinson still hasnt mentioned the cherie "Lie" story on his blog
http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/nickrobinson/
dear oh dear.. no wonder i come to Guido for the latest tittle tattle
Can I just say Guido that I find you extremely attractive when you're in this sort of mood.
Just wondering if you could pop round and tape up my mouth.
Ooops sorry, just a quickie.
Is it me or is Robbo quite short?
Also noticed he has quite a pointy nose.
You could always migrate to a forum (instead of a blog). That way you could let everyone read but only registered users could post - and they would have unique user IDs. That would prevent 'hasty' posts from first-timers since they would have to go through the registration process first.
Forum software also makes it easy to view comments history for registered users.
Of course with blogging software you don't need to know the first thing about the software or have your own server, which is probably why you use it.
"That would prevent 'hasty' posts from first-timers since they would have to go through the registration process first."
but thats the whole point of this blog - hasty posts from hacks and wonks...
What's wrong with cunt? A word can't deprave or corrupt - Richard Branson and The Sex Pistols put that bollocks to bed 29 years ago. If you're going to ban cunt then why not fuck, bloody, bugger etc etc - where do you draw the line?
Nigger? - chief of the defence staff snuck one of those in the woodpile on the Today Programme a few months back. Your blog's going to read like an episode of Grange Hill or the Archers if you go down that flipping, blooming, blimey road.
Don't tell me you didn't snigger when you read marywoodhouse saying that Gordon Brown was "just a cunt"? Leave it Guido, it's just a word, anyone who's offended by it deserves to be.
Eileen Critchley...
...You are really Peter Mandelson. Why dont you just use your real name.
The software can make everyone register, it can also be moderated. But it is less flowing if you do that.
This is not a forum, go to Comment is Freefor that. Comments are not there for you to post boring arguments. Theyare there for gossip, tittle-tattle and wit.
If I can't call a c*nt a c*nt can I at least call them a mimsy?
Or a lady's pocket?
@King John of Poland & Guido
I agree - in that case Guido will just have to accept comments from bores as a fact of life - or spend a lot of his time moderating.
Guido can burn whoever he likes.
Mr Fawkes.
here, here!
now then. just remind what did you jut say!
Too bleeding right! Your Blog, your territory, good move.
I agree with Samuelljackson - why can't we keep calling each other cunts? I don't find it offensive, nor does my wife, who is a woman, and who calls me a cunt on a regular basis.
Anonymous said......You are really Peter Mandelson. Why don’t you just use your real name.
How dare you!
It’s easy to prove I’m a lady and not Peter; I like men, my favourite player is Ronaldo and I’m currently wearing a gold lame thong!
Keep Off The Grass - It is an amenity to be enjoyed by everyone.
Did anyone see that swearword programme (I think on C4) a few months ago. Sorry I can't be specific but essentially it was about how sexual swearwords are now completely accepted on TV but racial swearwords are not - turning the 70's on it's head so to speak.
So surely in that spirit the 'c' word should be acceptable in this blog but the 'p' and 'n' words not.
Anyway back to the boring comments issue. It wouldn't take much to render such an open blog as this completely unreadable (or to thoroughly waste Guido's time). All it takes is a few determined users to post a flood of comments.
It's possible to outsource this sort of thing to places like China where spammers already pay locals a few dollars a day to decipher captchas in order to mass-register email accounts etc.
Just a thought - I believe it's possible for someone with enough motivation.
Guido - can you ban IP address ranges?
I would just switch on comment moderation.
I 'ad that Moko in the front of my cab once.
"switch on comment moderation"
Naturally - but I suspect that entails trawling through all the submissions to decide which ones get published.
That's the 'thoroughly waste Guido's time' part. Of course if maintaining this blog is actually Guido's full-time job then maybe it's not really a big deal.
You're going to be hard pressed to find anything as funny posted here as is goin goff on the airwaves for free - the Queen Ferret has set all the other ferrets fighting again and ... it's just too much fun for words. Sometimes you just have to sit back, and harvest, with a quiet eye, the sheer joy of nature, red in tooth and claw.
We's just had de mornin spliff but jumped back on ours feet when we's seen the name Moko.
Now we's all knows dat in de mythology de Moko is de king of de lizards. Obviously takin dis as his pseudonym is de subconscious move by de cuntributor. So who could it be, well takin de world situation into accunt, ours vote go to de biggest creep on de planet de Alastair Campbell.
Dear Senor Guido
Thank you for your surprisingly tolerant Blog Moderation policy ... and most of us are growing weary of so many [expletives deleted]
It has saved me from having to read the next morning my particularly moronic posts ... and double/triple-postings of the same post
Your obedient servant
G Eagle
guido requests an end to boring comments and 26 people (I just made it 27) take the opportunity to post a series of mind numbingly dull postings areeing
NOW THAT IS FUNNY!
You know it's a successful blog when we all start getting self-referential.
peter was it you I saw strolling through hyde park,coked up,laptop under arm and with only one sock on.
Rigger are you addressing "Peter Hitchens", Peter Hitchens or this tool?
Perhaps moko is just trying to make work for the long-rumoured blogging assistant? We should all support employment initiatives, as full employment takes up time that would otherwise be used making comments on blogs.
*runs off to comment other blogs*
Rigger no it wasnt , I was in hyde park yesterday
I had run out of coke, had a laptop , one shoe and some half mast, wide arsed ex portillo pants ,( I had swapped my socks for half a big mac that morning) you must have seen somebody else , as you know you see all sorts in London.
Gold lama thong, mmmmmmmmmmmm
Still not enough posts on here about ME, ME, ME
"peter"
I think there are far too many posting about peter Hitchens.
Although, if Guido were to print some Hitchens T shirts,
Maybe with slogans ?
The Hitch says "don't do it (vote for any of them)"
The Hitch says "my brother is an a*******"
The Hitch says "Princess tony is a vacuous ninny"
Naw, the shirts should obviously say "I AM PETER HITCHENS"
"peter Hitchens" is a front bottom!
Maybe
I am the "real" Peter Hitchens ?
I can confidently assert that "Peter Hitchens" is a man of uncommon learning and wit. I think I can speak for the nation when I say that he is equipped with a distinctive anatomical structure...
Is "schlong" banned or unbanned? My whole raison d'etre lies in jeopardy.
I think we're all pretty pro-schlong here.
I don't know what to say now I can't use the C word..
Raincoater,
I stand hugely reassured by your firm support.From this point on, its onwards and upwards for peter hitchens' schlong
I would be very grateful if someone could point out a better word to describe Blair. For me, the word cunt is the only one that I can think of, that descibes him totally and so concisely. I therefore feel obliged to use it every time I mention his name.
I know it is a bit sad but what do you expect in today's bog standard education climate.
Skewing things as ever Guido,most of that days posting was on the Peter Hitchens joke thread and all stayed there.What you deleted was my reply to a comment of yours directed at me that made you look a twat.That and mention of 2 Tory tales of sleaze and/or alleged criminal activity got taken off.
The C word is a good one to describe Tony Blair. If however that word is banned, how about Areswipe.
I think that sums him up almost as well.
I like to think of TB as a "schlong among equals".
Moko is a four-letter word.
Oh! my old man's a dustman,
and he wears a dustman's hat!
He wears cor blimey trousers,
and he lives in a 'grace and favour mansion on the outskirts of Londo' (???).
Prescott you big fat twat you fucked my song up!
Have you ever wondered what a corparation actually is? You can find all your answers amongst the following resources.
I think we're all pretty proschlong here best wishes and good luck.
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